I never knew that being a woman was so calming ..

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  • #100721
    Anonymous
    Inactive

    Hello to  my reader

    I am glad you  stopped  by to  take a glance at my first foray on the forum

    I find  talking about myself is  a bore , but then again  I have lived every mile  that is behind me.

    I was born  right before  the 1960’s  began .   I am a boomer  I guess as they say

    I think I had a good  childhood.  I had my  bumps and bruises as we all do

    I was a shy kid  in school and did  well as grades go.    Teachers wrote on my  report card that  they wished I spoke up more as I knew the answers most times.

    But  school wasn’t for me.   I would would have rather been outdoors  playing

    I  had a few friends and those that I  cherished them.  I met my BFF  in the third grade.  But before  the fifth  grade he  went to  another school in town  as the opened a new school closer to his house.

    We  met in  middle school  again  .When we graduated high school  he and i stood next oto each other to get our diplomas     Seeing him was  spotty but you know how it goes.    But he  did invite me to his wedding and  I  also attended his daughters baptism .  He got  divorced and move to Florida     His daughter is now grown  up  and is serving our country and has  kids of her own     You don’t get  friends like this very often and he and  try to stay in touch as much as we can  , but again life  happens

    But anyways  enough all that and more about boring me!  LOL.

    I was always a skinny kid and have fair skin.   Till I was about 6 or  so I had  blond hair.   Then it  went brown .

    By the time I was in eighth grade I started developing  breasts.  I could have stood  a training bra  but  back then  boys were  boys and girls were  girls and  as we know  back than well

    I was picked on and bullied  because I  just was different from others.   I cried a lot  but I  learned to hid my  hurt.

    I was not athletic  at all.  I was so clumsy that  I got a doctors note to be excused from  gym glass.   I had no upper body strength  at that time.

    I always liked girls and still do  but  dating  them , well I got the  “I like you but  !” reply   Again  buried me inside myself.

    I had a  study hall teacher who  when she saw what I had typed randomly  on a typewriter     Yes kids that was our  pc before it was  sitting in our laps

    She  encouraged me to  keep writing and   50 plus years later  I am still writing.   I learned writing from the best  Lennon and McCartney .   I would sit  listening to their words and cadences     This is how I  learned  to write poetry .

    My sexual experiences  were  few  and  I  did so love it.    But nothing solid   I think I know why now     I saw what my parents had  5o years of  love  and I think I wanted that .    But  the right one  never came along

    I was never interested in men . Men  can be  so cave man like  and  strut about  like a  rooster.

    Okay so there is that

    But through time I  came more aware of  Danielle Marie.   At first her name was Michelle and then Marie  .   I have read it takes awhile for  your other side to decide on a name.      And I fell upon Danielle Marie

    She is calming and  confident  , she  has shown me  not to be angry at life anymore.   That  it is all okay .  That  all the bullying  was not my fault but the person  who hurt me.    As they say “It’s on them!”

    What I have  noticed now is that I tend to swear less and try to make a effort not to do so.    I say  Oh poopies now   and   I also noticed I say   Welkies now too

     

    So  as for me dressing  I never  did so till I was  55 or so.

    I never knew  there were so many  choices in  woman’s under garments.    Hipsters ,  thongs,  bikini  , boy shorts , briefs  and it seems to go on

    I finally settled on  boy shorts and  microfiber  briefs and those are the most comfy for me

    As for Bras   well just learned from sisters in here  how to measure and bought my first  bra on line.   Will see how it does ,  delivery is  Tuesday

    I also  bought  a jean mini skirt and shorts.   I have womens  running shorts  , a couple of cams and a  couple of nigh shirts   One is even  a batgirl  night shirt

    Right now recovering from a fracture  left knee and I hobble  , I use a can  to keep myself steady .    I had to learn to walk again last year.   But my time in a rehab  center for  it  made me lose weight .  30 pounds in a month .   That is because I had limited access to food .   But came home and  it was back too old habits.    I love me  chips , cookies and  candy bars

    But  I am just not hungry  its seems and its been that way  for the past  3 or 4 years,     Somethings I love the taste of   Tomato  soup always hits the spot.   And  I admit it I am  in love with  pizza  .  I have been  visiting local pizza places  to  see how they taste and writing private reviews.     Best slice  on the run  Cumberland farms.   You can’t go wrong for $  99 cents or  $2.50 for  the  3 meat  slice.

    I used to like to hike , explore nature. As I said I write, I am trying my hand  at art work.  I take photographs  .  I play  guitar , self taught mostly  and have  38 books of  various genres  on amazon .  I have  4 copyrighted works in the US copy right office

    I have my life goal list too.  I don’t like the stigma that  “Bucket list  ” has taken on.     Life goals is more positive .   When  one goal is  done I cross it off  and go on to the next one or another one takes its place

    There is nothing fancy  on the list. some of the things I have done

    1 Karaoke  singing    when in sing one song and ended up doing 6

    2. cracking an egg with one hand  ,  Its no easy feat  and  got to watch out for shells in your eggs.   YUCK

    3. Make a  decent omelet   . Trial and  error.   Most times it was scomlets    my  version of a hybrid  omelet and scrambled  eggs.    It works  lol

    I have done more things  but  i forgot them off the top of my head

    Just so you know I have always been good at mimicking  voices,    I used to do  John Wayne, Bogart  and others.

    I can still do  a little kids voice too,   Sometimes  when I am with my cousins I in empty aisle I  go “Mommy I gotta go pottie  ! ” and the kid gets a little louder.

    People are like  where is that little kid?    yeah I am warped i know

    My sense of humor runs that way .   Robin Williams was my idol.    When I first heard his album reality what a concept , I was like someone like me

    I knew I was not alone  anymore.    Listening to his comedy is like giving me a shot of brandy or a  blunt.    It is a high for me.   And before him there was Jonathan Winters , who was Robins idol too.    Jon could take a  baton and   do funny things with it.   A fishing pole a  chopstick  he was amazing

    In closing  I want to say  I am not sure how far  I will take Dani but I know she lives in me  .   I may never go any further than wearing undies under my pants .   But as I said  she has calmed me  and I feel more confident on who I am .

    Thank you again for reading my ramblings  and thank you for this site.  It is wonderful to be here and getting to know all you lovely people

    Peace love and harmony

    Dani

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

    4 users thanked author for this post.
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    Replies
    • #100755

      Hello to  my reader

      I am glad you  stopped  by to  take a glance at my first foray on the forum

      I find  talking about myself is  a bore , but then again  I have lived every mile  that is behind me.

      I was born  right before  the 1960’s  began .   I am a boomer  I guess as they say

      I think I had a good  childhood.  I had my  bumps and bruises as we all do

      I was a shy kid  in school and did  well as grades go.    Teachers wrote on my  report card that  they wished I spoke up more as I knew the answers most times.

      But  school wasn’t for me.   I would would have rather been outdoors  playing

      I  had a few friends and those that I  cherished them.  I met my BFF  in the third grade.  But before  the fifth  grade he  went to  another school in town  as the opened a new school closer to his house.

      We  met in  middle school  again  .When we graduated high school  he and i stood next oto each other to get our diplomas     Seeing him was  spotty but you know how it goes.    But he  did invite me to his wedding and  I  also attended his daughters baptism .  He got  divorced and move to Florida     His daughter is now grown  up  and is serving our country and has  kids of her own     You don’t get  friends like this very often and he and  try to stay in touch as much as we can  , but again life  happens

      But anyways  enough all that and more about boring me!  LOL.

      I was always a skinny kid and have fair skin.   Till I was about 6 or  so I had  blond hair.   Then it  went brown .

      By the time I was in eighth grade I started developing  breasts.  I could have stood  a training bra  but  back then  boys were  boys and girls were  girls and  as we know  back than well

      I was picked on and bullied  because I  just was different from others.   I cried a lot  but I  learned to hid my  hurt.

      I was not athletic  at all.  I was so clumsy that  I got a doctors note to be excused from  gym glass.   I had no upper body strength  at that time.

      I always liked girls and still do  but  dating  them , well I got the  “I like you but  !” reply   Again  buried me inside myself.

      I had a  study hall teacher who  when she saw what I had typed randomly  on a typewriter     Yes kids that was our  pc before it was  sitting in our laps

      She  encouraged me to  keep writing and   50 plus years later  I am still writing.   I learned writing from the best  Lennon and McCartney .   I would sit  listening to their words and cadences     This is how I  learned  to write poetry .

      My sexual experiences  were  few  and  I  did so love it.    But nothing solid   I think I know why now     I saw what my parents had  5o years of  love  and I think I wanted that .    But  the right one  never came along

      I was never interested in men . Men  can be  so cave man like  and  strut about  like a  rooster.

      Okay so there is that

      But through time I  came more aware of  Danielle Marie.   At first her name was Michelle and then Marie  .   I have read it takes awhile for  your other side to decide on a name.      And I fell upon Danielle Marie

      She is calming and  confident  , she  has shown me  not to be angry at life anymore.   That  it is all okay .  That  all the bullying  was not my fault but the person  who hurt me.    As they say “It’s on them!”

      What I have  noticed now is that I tend to swear less and try to make a effort not to do so.    I say  Oh poopies now   and   I also noticed I say   Welkies now too

       

      So  as for me dressing  I never  did so till I was  55 or so.

      I never knew  there were so many  choices in  woman’s under garments.    Hipsters ,  thongs,  bikini  , boy shorts , briefs  and it seems to go on

      I finally settled on  boy shorts and  microfiber  briefs and those are the most comfy for me

      As for Bras   well just learned from sisters in here  how to measure and bought my first  bra on line.   Will see how it does ,  delivery is  Tuesday

      I also  bought  a jean mini skirt and shorts.   I have womens  running shorts  , a couple of cams and a  couple of nigh shirts   One is even  a batgirl  night shirt

      Right now recovering from a fracture  left knee and I hobble  , I use a can  to keep myself steady .    I had to learn to walk again last year.   But my time in a rehab  center for  it  made me lose weight .  30 pounds in a month .   That is because I had limited access to food .   But came home and  it was back too old habits.    I love me  chips , cookies and  candy bars

      But  I am just not hungry  its seems and its been that way  for the past  3 or 4 years,     Somethings I love the taste of   Tomato  soup always hits the spot.   And  I admit it I am  in love with  pizza  .  I have been  visiting local pizza places  to  see how they taste and writing private reviews.     Best slice  on the run  Cumberland farms.   You can’t go wrong for $  99 cents or  $2.50 for  the  3 meat  slice.

      I used to like to hike , explore nature. As I said I write, I am trying my hand  at art work.  I take photographs  .  I play  guitar , self taught mostly  and have  38 books of  various genres  on amazon .  I have  4 copyrighted works in the US copy right office

      I have my life goal list too.  I don’t like the stigma that  “Bucket list  ” has taken on.     Life goals is more positive .   When  one goal is  done I cross it off  and go on to the next one or another one takes its place

      There is nothing fancy  on the list. some of the things I have done

      1 Karaoke  singing    when in sing one song and ended up doing 6

      2. cracking an egg with one hand  ,  Its no easy feat  and  got to watch out for shells in your eggs.   YUCK

      3. Make a  decent omelet   . Trial and  error.   Most times it was scomlets    my  version of a hybrid  omelet and scrambled  eggs.    It works  lol

      I have done more things  but  i forgot them off the top of my head

      Just so you know I have always been good at mimicking  voices,    I used to do  John Wayne, Bogart  and others.

      I can still do  a little kids voice too,   Sometimes  when I am with my cousins I in empty aisle I  go “Mommy I gotta go pottie  ! ” and the kid gets a little louder.

      People are like  where is that little kid?    yeah I am warped i know

      My sense of humor runs that way .   Robin Williams was my idol.    When I first heard his album reality what a concept , I was like someone like me

      I knew I was not alone  anymore.    Listening to his comedy is like giving me a shot of brandy or a  blunt.    It is a high for me.   And before him there was Jonathan Winters , who was Robins idol too.    Jon could take a  baton and   do funny things with it.   A fishing pole a  chopstick  he was amazing

      In closing  I want to say  I am not sure how far  I will take Dani but I know she lives in me  .   I may never go any further than wearing undies under my pants .   But as I said  she has calmed me  and I feel more confident on who I am .

      Thank you again for reading my ramblings  and thank you for this site.  It is wonderful to be here and getting to know all you lovely people

      Peace love and harmony

      Dani

       

       

       

       

       

       

       

       

       

       

       

       

       

      You write soo beautifully! I very much loved reading your post!

      1 user thanked author for this post.
    • #100749

      Hello Dani ,

      A lot of us can relate to your story and it does bring a smile …we aren’t alone on this rock . Sharing is growth , growth is progress , progress leads to community and it’s great having you being a part of it 1

       

      Alexis

      1 user thanked author for this post.
    • #100742
      DeeAnn Hopings
      AMBASSADOR

      Dani:

      I just about teared up when you mentioned both Robin Williams and Jonathan Winters. While many know of Robin Williams, the tendency is that one needs to be more like our ages to really be acquainted with Winters. Both were simply masters of their craft, and beyond that, I think they had a very good sense of what comedy is, how it impacts people and what it does for them. When I was a kid I discovered that I sometimes had similar wacky thoughts about the things that Winters found humorous. It wasn’t unusual for me to find something that he did Really Funny, but was only mildly amusing to the rest of my family. But, that was OK as I knew that there was someone that I could relate to. Anyway, I miss them both very much.

      I was also 55 (2003) when I first dressed completely, albeit without makeup. What I discovered was that while I had a bit of anxiety about being seen by someone that I knew, I didn’t feel odd in wearing the clothes. That was an unexpected revelation. That got me to thinking and set me on the path to where I am now.

      Eventually some things occurred to me as I progressed from then to now. Every step I take informs the next. Everything that I do and figure out works to complete the circle. Clearly this is not the work of a minute. If we progress too swiftly, we lose the detail and the subtlety and we miss out on the richness and nuances of the journey.

      Finally, thanks for completing your Profile page. It lets others know what is going on for us. You can also update it at any time when something changes. With the creation of new threads, this one will slip down the pile, but your Profile pages is always there…

      • #100754
        Mia Story
        FREE

        jonathan winters and robin williams are on youtube with johnny carson. i crack up every time i watch the one with winters in a yankee civil war costume. yeesh!

    • #100734

      Hi Dani…

      Thank you for sharing…

      I can relate to much of what you wrote about your younger years…

      Yes… dressing and doing other womanly things is very calming. It is very addictive.

      Love,

      Gen ❤

    • #100729
      Michelle Larsen
      AMBASSADOR

      Dani, wow, that is a lot to digest. I’m gonna have to read and digest that in some chunks. But I love it. It is nice to see a lot of info so we have a better understanding of each other. Michelle

      2 users thanked author for this post.
    • #100722

      Dani, I feel I grew up with you now….lol that’s your life in a nut shell as they say. Anyway, I’m new here too but welcome and hope to chat with you sometime.

      1 user thanked author for this post.
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