I think I am trans, but I need to be sure

  • Creator
  • #90566
    Isla Sheppard

    I am Isla, aged 61 and recently realised that I am not really the bloke I thought I was. Some 40 plus years ago I first heard of a “sex change” and I remember thinking at the time that that would be wonderful because I wouldn’t have to struggle to be manly enough. However I had a male body and got on with life, to the extent that I eventually found a girl friend, who is now my wife. Reproduction didn’t go as expected; I knew what to do, but could never get excited enough. Over a year of psychotherapy every week got me going to the extent that I now have an 18 year old son.

    Some ten years or so ago I started wearing leggings, telling myself that men could wear leggings as well as women, then ladies shoes, and then nearly two years ago I bought a skirt, telling myself the same thing. What I hadn’t expected was the effect wearing a skirt would have on me; suddenly I felt better, far more effect than a different style of clothing ought to have. With working at home this year I have been wearing skirts most of the time this year, and whilst it has been wonderful it seems to have let the genie out of the lamp. I now realise what I hadn’t before, I think I am transgender

    This is to the extent I now know I want to be a woman, BUT I don’t want to want to be woman if you get what I mean. I have realised that when I see an attractive lady/girl, my thought is not the normal manly response of wouldn’t it be great to be intimate with her, my feeling is that I want to be her.

    I came out to my wife a few weeks ago, and that didn’t go well, though she is now being more supportive than she was. Understandably she wants a professional opinion about my state.

    My employer’s health insurance has agreed to fund 3 sessions with a psychiatrist to try to sort out the anxiety I am suffering from as a result of this, but not the gender dysphoria as such. How it is possible to sort out one without the other I can’t imagine, but time will tell. So, I am looking for a UK based psychiatrist with a known interest in transgender cases like me. Does any one know one; it is easy for me to look up whether or not any suitable person is approved by the insurance.

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  • Author
    • #91518
      DeeAnn Hopings


      You seem to be of that subset of people who crossdress for which dressing becomes an revealing experience. It serves as a way to explore ones true gender identity. Effectively, it allows a Peek In The Box and becomes something to embrace.

      So, glad you could join us and I encourage you to completely fill out your Profile. It helps folks get to know you better.

    • #91514
      Carly Holloway

      Hi, Isla.  What a beautiful name!  I, too, am in my 690’s, and started my life over a year ago.  Sorting out everything to mame a decision took a long time.

      I invite you to be at home on TGH site, and joint in the chat, the forums, and devour the articles.  There is so much support, information, wisdom and experience here that you are sure to get something.  At our age, there are a lot of complicating factors in making a transition, and we need all the support we can get

      I am happy to see you here, and I hope to see more of you on chat.  Please, don’t be shy and jump in head first here!.

      Peace and love             Carly

      1 user thanked author for this post.
    • #90573

      Well first of all, you are the only one that knows whether you are transgender or not! Nobody can diagnose you that way! They can diagnose that you have gender dysphoria,  but not whether you are or arent! You have to decide if you want to listen to yourself or them! I learned long ago to listen to what is best for me. I would still be someone people walked on if I hadn’t started paying attention to what I wanted and needed. Stay true to yourself!

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