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Why real world issue?
Cause for me this is. I have joined a few dating sites and apps. Hoping to find someone, or anyone, cause I know I need to move on with life and stop letting go by. But one of my biggest issues is, just like this site and our sister site CDH. You may really never know who you are chatting or talking to. I have been fortunate to find many good friends on our site. And these friendship have been long lasting and honest.
But today I had that encounter that I know most of us or maybe just me didnt want to have. Talking to the spouse. You know its said that we lie to ourselves about who we are and how we perceive life!
But what about cis men looking for a booty call. Who is really lying to themselves. I was honest that I am transgender looking for a long term relationship. But all I got where messages of I am discreet, or in the closet, I am single. A false and unrealistic reality. They lie.
Sorry admires that come here looking for a relationship. This is the number one reason why we have that policy. To protect us from the places that subject us to the lies of man.
Again, who is really lying to themselves, Me! or the Meet?
Please if you reply : no graphic sex stuff or stories or rape. I may just end up deleting or banning you.
**HUGS**
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It is a treacherous existence to be dating online. I have only joined one site and it is shameful to see the number of scammers, trans-chasers, and generally despicable characters on the site.
It is always good to be cautious. I am very leary of anyone wanting to move the chat off the dating site quickly (i.e. within the first few exchanges)… and anyone who claims to love me or want to be with me forever (we haven’t even TALKED and you want to marry me! WTF!).
A good practice that I have tried (and have yet to get burned so far) is a burner email rather than your phone number… you can easily create a gmail account and chat via Hangouts with it rather than give out your real phone number or email address.
Mikayla
It is interesting how things work. I have very limited experience with dating sites, but I have noticed some disturbing trends on Facebook. Men are sending friend requests that are questionable. Some of the things that are suspicious are:
- They joined last week
- They have only a handful of friends, if that
- Little, if any, personal information
- Personal information that doesn’t make sense
- Middle eastern location
Note that all items do not have to be present at the same time…
Jasmine
You have only touched the surface. As you spoke it is relatively easy to pick out lies. But they are getting creative as to predatory scams. Some of them even try and extort us for money # They will alert your family of your photos, both public and private. They use our hearts depression, and loneliness against us and what really stinks is that it is (grey line) legal. If they are banned they return with a different profile pic and E-mail.
I have been on them and as a Net + person I have a way to verify but most do not. BEEEE Careful. They are adamant and tenacious . I have had 1 man try 3 times on 2 different sites from Florida. # Pay attention to the area code and google it.
It would be awesome to have a “strict but fair with respect to spare” type site run like this one does. I have quite a few ideas as to how to make it happen. And may just do it after my surgery Huggz Tracee
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Thank you Tracee, good words of advice. And for those out there, really heed Tracees advice. I do have fun chatting with these guys. And I suspect no truth from them. Careful with the pics you send. NO NUDES. They may come back to haunt you. I am sure someone here has dealt with this. And I am feeling better now. Being more careful, asking more questions and not letting anyone treat me like a piece of meat. Funny though, I didnt realize just how many men claim to be interested. Even if they are try to live out a fantasy or just in denial that they are gay. I know its wrong, but most of us that realize who we are later in life, may have used a woman to create the fantasy of being normal. And for those of you that are still doing it, love your wifes. Just remember, we have all lied at sometime and trust your gut when you know you’re being lied to!
**HUGS**
“need to move on with life and stop letting go by”… every time I think I’ve gotten to that point something else happens. I yearn for a peaceful stretch of time when I’d rather be yearning for something else.
Another one of those reasons we have this site. Too many of us are in a vulnerable state and need somewhere stable to rest.
Some day, but for now just letting things happen naturally because nothing is in total control.
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