Mum of 17yrs old trans son. Any advice to support him welcome.

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    Topic
  • #96400
    Helen Smith
    Participant

    Hi there, my son came out to me 18 months ago. We changed his name to his chosen one as soon as we could, i think it took 2 weeks approx. I helped him to tell family members and friends (or just on his behalf at his request). He has lived as himself since then. He has not pushed for physical change but says he wants it. We found a few youth groups local to where we live and he has made some friends. If anyone can give me advice or experiences I’d be really greatful. I’m trying to understand what hes going through and what he needs from me. He finds it difficult to explain these things to me.
    Many thanks to anyone who reads or answers.
    H xxx

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    • #96446
      Michelle Larsen
      AMBASSADOR

      Helen, I would really suggest digging through the Forums and Articles for some valuable things to think about. You will probably come across a lot that can help. And the nice thing is you can contact the author if you have questions. And look under Places -> Local Places to see what kind of support is close to where you live. You might find a local group that you can reach out too. I hope this helps, Michelle

      1 user thanked author for this post.
    • #96419
      Jess Mor
      FREE

      I am not young; however, I remember when I came out to my parents in the 1970’s. It was a different world back then and it was not pleasant. Fast forward many years. I have a wife I raised a son and I finally started coming unglued like a cheap suit. I can only offer you current experiences, but I am amazed at your support for your son. Just the support you are giving probably helps more than you know. I came out to my wife about two years ago and explained everything. We were married for 29 years when I dropped the bomb on her. We just celebrated our 31<sup>st</sup> anniversary. She is trying to help me in my transition and asks questions I cannot answer. She is trying to understand and help through this journey and I get a lot of questions on how she can help. Oddly it made our marriage stronger, and we get along better than ever. I know who I am, and I have known for a long time I just can not explain everything as this is new to me and I do not have all the answers. The fact that you are helping your son be the man he wants to be is a huge bonus knowing that you have support of your family means a lot. The fact that he has found friends like him and his age to know he is not alone is also fantastic. As he understands more of who he is I am sure he will be able to explain how he feels and what he needs in this journey. I am sure there are a lot of people here that can elaborate on this better than I ever could but for me just having support from family and knowing I am not alone is a major help in this process.

      3 users thanked author for this post.
      • #96428
        Helen Smith
        BRONZE

        Thank you and good luck on your journey. It’s lovely that you have a supportive person in your life.
        I dont expect to know the why of the way he is, he is who he is and he is wonderful. I’m just hoping that I’m doing and saying the right things and that he feels supported. I’ll be there for him whatever happens.

        1 user thanked author for this post.
        • #96438

          You are an Angel Helen… your son is Very, Very Lucky to have you as his Mother. A big hug and kiss to you Luv !!!  😘

          Gen ❤

           

          1 user thanked author for this post.
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