Plaything

  • Creator
    Topic
  • #102333
    Rikki
    Participant

    Hi everyone.

    Hope all is well with all in the community. I am glad to be a part of this community because as I read about you a feel a connection that I have never been able to find before.

    Curious tittle, eh? Since having recently publicly acknowledged that I am trans, I sometimes feel that I am a plaything for everyone; I don’t mean this in a sexual sense but rather as an amusement. Did anyone see the movie “The Crying Game”? At the same time, embracing my trans internally has been a plus for coping with this and even made it enjoyable.

    This is strange and new to me. Has anyone had similar experiences?

    Best regards.. Rikki

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

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    Replies
    • #102364

      Unfortunately it is a vicious circle.  Western society has traditionally not been very accepting of us, which causes many transgender people to hide who they are, which means that the general public only sees the few transgender people they do see as objects of curiosity in non-typical situations- e.g. porn, as butts of jokes, as comedic elements in movies and TV, as over the top “drag queens,” etc.  This creates a situation where people think those outliers are the norm when it comes to transgender people.  That’s why it is important for day to day, run of the mill, mundane, average transgender people to be visible.  The more people see us as, well, people, the more they will see that we are not “playthings” or curiosities, but just everyday human beings.

    • #102361

      Rikki,

      My wife has a almost completely different social circle then me.  I know of most of them, but am only a friend with one or two.  I cam out and wanted my wife to be able to be normal with her friends, so I told her to tell them I was a transgender-woman.  I told her that she was never going to be comfortable with me as long as she was not comfortable with her friends.  It actually is critical that she keep her friends for our relationship to have a chance.

      Tell them; I told her.  Let them laugh, let them tell a joke or two, let them feel sorry for you, let them do anything; but don’t let them not know.  You will never accept me until you get past your friends accepting you as the wife of a transgender-woman.  They will accept you.  You are not different, I am.  Allow yourself to enjoy the jokes; I do!  I make half of them up!

      Give your loved ones the freedom to be good in their own social circle.  Let the dialogue mature over time.  So, I am a “Plaything”, and you are a “Plaything”;  Lets pray they play in order to learn & grow, and become more loving.

      Lukcia

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