Right now I’m just in the stages of researching FTM HRT and reassignment surgery. Haven’t made any decisions yet and just want to educate myself. So far it seems like bottom surgery is the most problematic part of a full transition. It presents a lot of issues that I’m not sure I want to even chance having to put up with.
For one, it leaves an awful lot of scaring, not just at the genital site, but on other parts of the body as well. Another negative is all the post-operation health issues that come with it. It sounds like it’s almost inevitable that there will be some sort of complication that happens. I won’t go into detail, but some rather disturbing things can happen throughout the recovery process. But most importantly to me, is that sexual intercourse will be…. complicated at best and completely impossible at worst. Despite being a virgin at this point in my life, I still value sexual stimulation far too much to just give it up completely. There’s a very real possibility that I will lose the ability to feel aroused at all if I have bottom surgery and I just cannot live with myself if that happens.
I wonder if it’s possible to get HRT and top surgery while still leaving my female genitalia intact, both on the medical side of things, as well as the psychological side of things. Will I be able to accept myself as a male and will others accept me as a male even if I don’t have all the correct physical traits of one? I know that I very much want to have all the correct body parts of a male, but I want them to be functional, not just for show. I know I will always think of myself as a failed project if I don’t have a full transition, but at the same time, my sexuality is just as big a part of myself as my gender; separate, but just as valuable to my being. I might just have to compromise on this. Still… I’m unsure at this point and need to do more research.
Does anyone else have any advice or similar experiences they’d like to share with me? I’d appreciate anything you have to offer. Even if you are MTF, sharing what it was like for you to make the physical transition with me would be helpful. Thanks guys.
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