The end before the beginning!

[Angela Tepesch]

First I’m going to apologize for posting here if this is not where it belongs.

So… Last night I had the second conversation with my wife regarding me coming out. The first she was in a bit of shock, but now she has collected some of her thoughts and determined where she stood. My wife told me that she understood and that the mental part of my transition happened years ago and she was ok with that. However as far as the physical side goes, she would stand by side as my best friend but she just can’t be attracted to a female body. I already knew that it was going to be this way. In our 9 years married +3 together she has always talked about how she like the lumberjack/ 90’s biker look. You can’t get more masculine than that. So dead before it started. I get to be Angela through my brain, and in my heart, but to be able to keep my soulmate I have to keep the equipment. I don’t blame her, when we were married she married a 6’ 260lb hillbilly, she just didn’t know that I was a scared screaming female trapped in a body that was foreign to me. I told her that I was saddened by her choice but I respected it and would abide. I can be me in every way but surgically, I have read stories where others have gotten less. I told her I thanked her for her honesty and told her about tgh and that there where groups that she could talk in(she is not ready for that). I am sorry about the rant just needed someone else to hear my heart because my wife will never truly understand the hurt.

 

with love

Angela

[Elise Michelle]

I have no magic words of advice, but I wish you and your wife the best. I know it is a tough situation for you and I can appreciate how difficult it must be for her. Sending you both a big virtual hug.

[𝓜𝒾𝓈𝓈 𝓒𝓁ℴℯ́ 💋💋]

Angela,

I heard no rant.  It was a heartfelt and direct statement as to what is happening with you and your spouse.  As we’ve always said.  Your answer is within you and that includes what you need to do to consider your spouse.  We only wish the best for both of you.

Hugs, Cloe

[Anonymous]

Angela, I know your pain as I have had a very similar situation with my spouse. I can not say anything or do much but share tears with you.  My spouse still has her head in the sand and won’t join the site or find support anywhere.  I hope all the best for you and that it works out and when you figure it out let me know and I will do the same.

Miriya

[Danielle Fox]

Hi Angela,

I totally get where you’re coming from girl! I have made the same decision about transitioning and my marriage. I love my wife more than anything and I’d keep this male body to keep her. If you haven’t thought of it and can afford it the two of you should seek counseling to help understand what you both are going through. For a fact I know it helps with the pain and turmoil for both partners. Be true to yourself and your marriage is amazing when both agree on the structure and constraints of what it is to both. Be strong and be true is all of the advice I can give beyond counseling. Love ❤️ and hugs 🤗

Danielle💋👠👗

[Angela Ramirez]

Hi Danielle and Angela (awesome name)
<p style=”text-align: center;”>I just joined TGH and saw this message. I haven’t come out to my wife but plan to do so soon, after the holidays. I’ve thought a lot of what my wife is going to say. Like you girls she married a manly man. I guess my question for you two is how much do you get to be your authentic selves. Is that enough to keep you happy? During my years of denial and suppression I was difficult to live with at times and unhappy. There were good times as well.  After accepting myself I’ve been happier as if a weight was lifted from my shoulders. I don’t want to go back to being that unhappy person. It wasn’t easy to live with me at times. My wife is my best friend, I don’t want to lose her. I wonder if being Angela part time will be enough to be happy. I guess I wont know until I do it. This is also a discussion I’ve been having with my therapist.  I would like to get your perspectives as you’veived it. PM me if that is better.</p>
Hugs,

Angela

[Samantha Church]

Hi Angela,

I’m in the exact same boat as you are. My wife found out about Samantha and at first it hit her hard but over time we talked more and more about it and she has accepted her. One of our conversations she asked if I wanted to be a woman and also said the exact same, that if I did then she could no longer be with me and we could stay friends as she wants to be with a man and not a woman. So I had to sacrifice transitioning to stay with her. We have got 2 kids and 1 on the way and I really don’t want to break up our marriage for their sake as it’s not fair on them or my wife. Like you I get to be Samantha whenever I want and she also suggested that I go to groups and let out who I really am inside which I am grateful for as I really have fun being me out with others behind closed doors if that makes sense.

Samantha x

[Stacy Ann]

Much love to you, Angela.

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