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Yesterday evening I decided that it was time for me to start living full-time as a female. I changed out of my everyday guy clothes and into my correct birth female clothes. Decided that I needed to go grab a few items from the grocery store and decided that I was going to go out no matter what. Headed to the grocery store was halfway there when I was pulled over by a local police officer. The first thing out of the officers mouth what is license and registration. When I handed him my license his facial expression did a complete 180 and he looked at me as if I was some type of criminal. His remarks to me where your license says and mail but I’m not looking at a male I’m looking at a female. I wrote down all of his information because I do not know what to do with this so I’m asking all you ladies what should I do? Do I report him and his behavior toward me or do I ignore it? I’m in my transition phase and I’m doing my living as a complete female for a year as my reassignment surgery will be coming up after this. It made me feel so horrible when the officer looked at me like I was a criminal, I’m just presenting myself the way that I feel. Why should I be looked at any different?
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I just found out on the phone here in Canada Nov. 8 I now have legaL status as female but still transitioning waiting for my new Birth Certificate but I’m sure I’ll be clocked until I die – I’m happier than ever – at 60 maybe I’ll fit in better not being a 20 year old beauty trans women – a late bloomer ( child of the 60’s ) – for now it’ll be family bathrooms/gender neutral – I can Invision a female cop outside the stall door banging on it and forcing me out being turned in by a natural born CIS female who will be eating “ CROW “ when ID is pulled out – it’s what it is – a cop can’t deny the right to pee in a Women’s bathroom if your legally female – Society can stick it up there butts – I’ll be who I really am.
I might say,get used to it,I have run into this so many times perhaps I have become jaded,but it never gets easy to deal with,and I might ad I am post op MTF. and have female ID,but not always completely passable. that is why now I present male,and run into the reverse problem when I show my FEMALE ID.
I ended up doing an ID with my original MALE birth certificate,so I would not have this happen again People can also be nasty no matter what your LEGAL: status is,nature of the beast I suppose.
I at times worry they may accuse me of a crime for having a male ID when I am now legally FEMALE. The issue never ends it seems. in a technical way I could be accused of a violation of using the male restroom when I am legally female.
I mainly do this to placate them,and THEIR ISSUES.
I can feel for you Sam… I had a very similar problem which most here probably would of loved but when I moved to this state years ago I had an ID made because of the issues I had with an out of state ID getting into bars and buying things where you needed ID and I still had a home in the other state and just renewed my DL there.
I was dressed in what I considered my male dress but I had my hair down that day because of the picture. I didn’t want to just have my hair pulled back in a tight ponytail. No issues i filled out the card got my pic and ID and left…when I got home I pulled it out just to look it over again and happened to see and F under sex! Yes she made me a woman on my ID. I was sort of flattered but also taken back as I use my ID to go into a lot of special places. Even when I got my DL switched over I thought they’ll change it then as I was scared to say hey i’m a male and my ID says Female and have all kinds of trouble straightening things out.
Long story short I went several years as a Female on my DL until they finally changed it at one renewal and never said a thing! I had even gotten stopped once and the cop never mentioned it… lol politically correct maybe? who knows but I was always worried about being stopped and questioned for being a guy…. LOLOL I had often thought…what do I say…I’m a woman transitioning into a male? lol
I would have told him “respectfully sir, I am a transgender woman and would appreciate the use of my preferred pronouns of she/her/hers”. That would be the limit of any confrontation in that interaction as he already had a reason for pulling you over and the goal is just to process the infraction. No escalation if he didn’t change his behavior, it would only seen to be evasive in nature and would escalate things.
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I agree with Cloe on traffic stops. I’ve been pulled over three times in my state since transitioning. I drive for work and it’s usually just to tell me a tail light’s out. The first time I just smiled, handed him my license and insurance card while letting him know my pronouns are she/her/hers, thank you. My ID then was my deadname and male ID. The other two times I had my name and female ID. I didn’t say a thing and it was fine the second and kind of the third time. The last time the officer misgendered me with a “sir” and before I could say a word he super apologized and called me “ma’am” throughout the rest of the I have a tail light out speech. Getting carded at bars gives me a grin most of the time as the bouncer or barkeep gets this furrowed brow and confused look while they keep flipping my ID over and over to make sure it’s real. Some people are just mean. But reporting it? I’d say not worth the trouble unless you feel harassed and your state has trans protective laws.
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You know Police go by the license info. – basically you surprised him – you ‘ll need to get your name changed first then gender marker after seeing a psychologist about 4 times , then you’ll be on your way – just part of life – complaining to the PD won’t do you any good – expect this transitioning and relax – forget it.
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