Weight gain and weight loss , found my ticket !

[Anonymous]

Being laid off from work has giving some extra time to dwell on things and one thing that keeps popping up , just won’t leave me along and that has been controlling my weight which has been frustrating with back and forth results . Many different diets and pills which not only didn’t give results but ended in more weight gain and the rising question …do I look fat in these ? Know full well the anwser will be a lie .

Started going through my journals and I notice a patteren in relation to my weight . I was child very young any chance I get I would dress up in my sisters clothing. Even went to school a few times. That did’t go over very well . But I was happy being a little girl . Parents didn’t approve of this and punishment always followed . My Dad put an end to that in house , but it didn’t stop there . When vivting my grandma she would let me wear her lipstick and a bit of plush ever now and then little on the right ckeek little on the left . Parents pick me up early and that was the final nail in the coffin . It was after this is when I started gaining weight .

My teens was the same and early adult hood still had troubles with my weight . When I fianlly told my family that I was tansgender only thing they said to me was …well we’re not paying for it . I started dress as female again , the weight was coming off , However this didn’t last long . Wear I was living there wasn’t the resources or doctors to help me and this left me depressed ,,, weight started coming back again .

I moved to a larger city hoping for better opps . It was a few years before the desire to be female were back even stronger . I called my folks and let them know that I was moving forward this and they figuared sooner or later it was bound to happen . Back to building my up my collection of cloths . At first it was just going out with female friends , shopping with my two sisters . But not at work . I was some what happy and the weight started to drop once again . Start on hormones and this is when my eating habits really changes and the weight was melting away . I went from 250 pounds down to 150 only had 20 more pounds to lose , went for my surgery and continued to loss the extra pounds . A dramatic event took place in life and I pretty much close out the world , family friends everything …

The weight came back and then some . So now that I’m back on my hormones life is starting to feel like it is getting back on track but with even more pounds to drop then before …I’ll get there ! What really gets me is I’m an analitical thinker with reason of logic …this took 49 years to figure it out !

How do ladies control your weight and what steps do you take ?

Sorry for being long winded , just nice to be able to communicate and I like be chatty .

 

Terri

 

[DeeAnn Hopings]

Hi:

Nothing to add here beyond this:

To me the important thing is the time and effort you put into understanding your situation better and realizing how the dots connected together. That isn’t just a learning; that is a life lesson…

[Anonymous]

Wow. Women do not have an easy time controlling their weight, thus most diet programs are marketed towards them.

You mentioned that when you told your parents you were trans their response was they were not going to pay for it. That would have been the best response I got from my parents.  The worst response was one reason I did not come out until well after they passed away.

[Anonymous]

Hi Jamie ,

We don’t have it easy at all when it comes watching our weight and those marketing programs don’t work . They give us a lot of false hopes and empty wallets .

I was very fortunate to have my parents support and my family when I first came out . I was very close to my dad , not so much my mom . I know she loves me and we talk once a week . My dad passed away 7 years but I still talk with him  and he watches over me .

I can only image how divided you must felt inside not being able to tell family . How did you handle this ?

DeeAnn , it was a life lesson .

 

Terri

[Anonymous]

Hello Terri. If you read my profile you will see that my parents sent me to conversion therapy when I was 5 years old. That did not cure me but it did push me deep into the closet and make me deathly afraid of getting caught dressing. Then having spent a career in a very homophobic and transphobic military I was 60 before I started my transition.

All this resulted in a lot of depression through the years and thoughts of suicide the last 5 years before I transitioned.

[Author]

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