- September 23, 2022 at 9:16 pm #133180Lauren MugnaiaParticipant
Very long story made short. After dealing for years with gender dysphoria, feeling forever that I was a girl, and finally facing the reality that I am transgender, a trans woman, I have transitioned and I’m now legally a female.
But, and it’s a big but, I am still dealing with some dysphoria, physical dysphoria. So far my transition is what is known as social transition, I have not done HRT yet as there are health restrictions and I have not had any surgery.
I find myself really longing to have my own breasts. Right now I wear very realistic breast forms with my bras, I’m basically free of most body hair, have my own long nails, nice hairdo, feminine voice, I pass most of the time, but there are still those who scrutinize me a bit closer and figure it out. So my question is this, would breast implants make it easier to pass? As in, if I was wearing a low cut top, and displaying some genuine cleavage, would that help in being more convincing?
I would love to hear your thoughts on this girls.
Lots of hugs,
Ms. Lauren M
- September 28, 2022 at 9:47 am #133259BarbBRONZE
Hey Lauren and all!
I was hesitant to say anything, but WTH.
It is a wonderful day when someone compliments your breasts!
I’m a bit of an odd-ball. I have naturally protruding breasts. Much of this is genetics and diet and only God knows. Also, there are many foods high in estrogen: berries, soy and dairy products, just to name a few. I drink about a litre of milk a day just because I love milk, notwithstanding the possible breast growth benefits.
Recently, I got together with some transwomen who have surgically transitioned. They’ve become dear friends. We got giggly and silly one night and had a “Breast Reveal Party”. When they saw mine, their eyes popped out. I’m told they are “cute”. LOL!!
Yeah, it feels good and affirming! I can’t hide them anymore, especially in the summer with only a T-shirt on. I’m not boasting, but just letting you know that they are wonderful and they feel like they should be there! And, when I wear a lycra LBD, I don’t wear a bra because an LBD is like pantyhose for boobs! LOL!!
So… if you want implants, then who am I to say “no”.
PM me if you’d like to talk further about this. I could even… I dunno… send you a pic?
Love, Barb 🙂
- September 28, 2022 at 9:11 am #133258Michelle LawsonMANAGING AMBASSADOR
More able to pass? Able to show some cleavage? Most likely. But maybe not in the way you may think. Breast forms, in my case, were that constant reminder that, ‘no, I’m not’. Having a BA (almost one year now) reminds me that, yes, they are there. They are me. And they don’t come off. Ever! So, that added mental and emotional boost goes a long way in how happy you may be out in public. And that just has to make it easier to pass. Confidence is a huge plus!
- September 25, 2022 at 10:07 pm #133206Marg ProdueFREE
Hi Lauren, Yes I think that I agree with the others here and think that your best approach is to just be you. If that involves a surgery, ok and if not that’s ok too. It’s really you that determines your own outlook when you look in the mirror but don’t base any decisions on what you think others see. When I first had breasts and cleavage (naturally occurring) I didn’t like them and I thought that that wasn’t me. I hid them and covered them up. Then when I realized what was going on in my body and accepted it, I was ok with them and actually would wear a low cut top or bikini. Now that I’m much older (think granny) my breasts have slowly started melting down my chest and I miss them but I wouldn’t get them surgically replaced. It’s just the latest version of me and I’m ok with that. I have women friends that have no breast tissue and they are very beautiful and feminine and are happy as they are. And then I have other women friends that have had several surgeries to change things that they disliked about their bodies. In the end they were all just themselves. Perhaps the grass is always greener elsewhere. If I got the lotto, I would get a new nose. For me that’s the body part that unsettles me the most but in reality that is the nose that I will probably take to my grave. So, I think that you are as womanly as you think you are. I hope this is of some help. Marg
- September 26, 2022 at 12:53 pm #133214
Thanks for your thoughts on the matter. 🙂
I am now waiting to hear from my cardiologist, there is now a newer form of estradiol that is a transdermal patch, it isn’t as prone to cause blood clots, but there are still a lot of potential side effects for older people, especially if you’ve had cardiac issues. And the more I think about it, regarding surgery, as both of us know, at our age we really don’t want to go through any surgery unless it’s really necessary. I already have enough of my own breast tissue to enjoy wearing my chemise, so I think I’ll be okay with what I have and how I look. 🙂
Hugs, big hugs,
Ms. Lauren M
- September 27, 2022 at 3:59 am #133221Marg ProdueFREE
Lauren you are beautiful no matter what. I had a surgery stopped in mid-operation because they were scared of sudden heart issues. It really caused a lot of problems for me. First because they never finished, and second because nobody wanted to touch me after that. We can private message if you ever want more details but you have definitely raised a good point. I still think that I can rock it with my current body and a good pushup bra. I’m satisfied also with where I’m at in my life now. Safe Journey, Marg
- September 25, 2022 at 4:47 pm #133201Dana MunsonSILVER
I share your longing for real breasts of my own – it’s a gender-confirming thing for me (“others’ mileage may vary,” as they say). Thought I would be stuck with the implant route, due to typical HRT restrictions on someone my age (69). But since my endo said I could probably start on estrogen next year (after may half a year of blockers), it’s “real breasts or bust” (pun intended). BUT . . . “make it easier to pass”? Only with respect to certain types of revealing clothing. DeeAnn’s right, I think: passing involves a lot more than having real boobies. Good breast forms, whilst not the ideal, certainly work in almost all day-to-day situations (I personally am not in a hot rush to don a bikini or low-cut party dress!). As important as they may be as an ultimate goal for many of us, having real breasts is not nearly at the top of the list of things necessary to being successful as an everyday woman.
- September 24, 2022 at 9:06 am #133183DeeAnn HopingsAMBASSADOR
As a disclaimer, I’ll say that while my social transition is essentially complete, I have no plans related to physical transition. However, I will speculate.
Passing is a multifaceted concept and it also has a situational part to it. I agree that there is likely some part related to having a real bosom, but the thought is how often would you wear something sufficiently low cut? It wouldn’t be going out to lunch during the week. It probably wouldn’t be going to the grocery store. It would seem s bit limited to times when you were either dressed up or pretty casual (tank tops, for example). I guess you would have to consider how often those situations came up.
As I said, passing is a multifaceted deal and there are so many parts to it. Some of the bits and pieces that come to mind are:
- Appropriate clothes for the event and time of day
- Good fitting clothes
- Are the clothes stylistically compatible your physique, age, etc.
- Properly accessorized
- Complimentary hair style
- Stylish heels (no hooker heels!)
I think the overriding thought is that everything the exudes femininity and nothing that does’t. Said another way, you want to give someone every possible bit of information that you are, in fact, female. Anyway, it would seem that cleavage is only one of a number of factors…
- September 24, 2022 at 9:24 am #133184
Hi DeeAnn, I was waiting to see what you had to say 🙂
At this point it’s just a thought that won’t go away. With regards to making ‘passing’ easier, you are right, you’d have to wear very revealing tops or dresses, something that I can’t do at work each day.
Regarding my ponderings, it’s one of those “I wonder what it would feel like” “What would it be like?” “Would it make me feel more like a real woman?” things. So it’s a major thing to do when I already accomplish everything on your list. 😉
Ms. Lauren M
- September 24, 2022 at 10:49 pm #133186DeeAnn HopingsAMBASSADOR
“Would it make me feel more like a real woman?”
I think that may be the important point and it is a part of the Attitude piece. The more we are comfortable, the better we feel. The better we feel, the more comfortable we are.
For me, what I’ve noticed is that when I feel good about how I am dressed, the word “passing” isn’t in my thoughts. It’s like I’ve settled into a different thought process. Whatever it is, something shifted a bit. Maybe what that means is that my thinking has moved from trans woman to more like woman…
- September 24, 2022 at 8:11 am #133182Shiloh RoseFREE
I would have to leave my vote out on this question.
I don’t try to pass or blend in.
I struggled with this when I first came out. It ruled my life and almost ruined my life.
And I had so many Natural Females not like the fact that I was trying to be something I was not.
I stopped trying and just started learning to live transgender. Just being me each day.
Now those same Females treat me awesome. They give me advice, encouragement, help.
But now I am not trying to trick them into thinking that I am one of them.
I am very happy to be me,transgender and proud….I will always be transgender…
I don’t know know if there is truly any way to actually do anything to make it where we can fit in better……IMHO
Shiloh Rose 🌹
- September 25, 2022 at 1:59 am #133187
- September 25, 2022 at 6:52 pm #133203Dana MunsonSILVER
I second Lauren, Rachel. Nothing fake-looking about you!
As for the HRT via transdermal patch, that’s what my endo said he’d be willing to prescribe after I spend a few months on blockers and have my orchi. The lower dosage of hormone in the patch apparently can be effective once all the nasty boy juice is purged, and the lower dosage presents less risk (clotting principally, given my age).
- September 25, 2022 at 6:43 pm #133202
Nope, you certainly don’t look like a fake, LOL. You look gorgeous girl! Very pretty!
I was actually borrowing a quote from another list that I read. Now that I’m thinking more about it, I’m going to wait and see what my cardiologist says about a newer version of HRT that uses transdermal patches for estradiol instead of oral pills, the oral versions can cause blood clots, which could be fatal for me.
Ms. Lauren M
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