My name is Jenna. I reside in Honolulu and I identify as mtf transgender. Although I live as my masculine male self the majority of the time, I do periodically venture out as my female self. It’s been a long journey trying to accept this side of me. I’ve had feelings of wanting to be a girl as far back as I could remember. Being raised in a conservative family/community has made it extremely difficult. I played sports all through my childhood years which didn’t make it any easier. I really didn’t know the meaning of transgender back then. I’m in my fourties’ now. I started dressing off and on as a kid and through my 20’s privately. I ventured out publicly for the first time in 2014 while in my thirties. I’m originally from Northern California and made friends in the trans community there. I moved to Hawaii in 2018. I’ve been through counseling and have learned that “ I “ am the only one that can make the decision to transition or not. I went for it and began HRT in 2020 (just before Covid) only to stop after 1 month. I took it as far as I was comfortable. I even obtained a full time job as Jenna at a women’s department store during that time. When Covid shut everything down, my journey was put on hold. Besides Covid, I think nerves, my life path, and the fear of losing family and friends also has prevented me from moving forward. I now have a supportive girlfriend of 2 years. She identifies as bi and is completely into to both sides. We’ve found a good balance together. We go out to dinner/shopping about once a week as girlfriends. Gender fluidity (externally) seems to be working for me and for us. I don’t consider myself passable necessarily but seem to be convincing in most places I go, and have not had any problems. Dressing for the occasion/venue and carrying myself with confidence is key. I was a member of cross dresser heaven at one point but I feel transgender heaven may be a better fit. I’ve had a hard time making connections in the trans community in Hawaii so I’m hoping to make friends and learn more about myself and others in order to be more comfortable with my journey here. Thank you to all who is reading this and I hope your Journey is a positive one…. Hugs Jenna