Selfie in mirror

| | 0

by brendaleigh
in

That's Me! Brenda Leigh!

|

More by the same author

The following two tabs change content below.

Breanna Leigh

Hi Everybody, Thank you for taking the time and having the interest to read my profile. My first memory of feeling like a girl in a boys body was when I was just 5 years old. I put on my neighbors dress and told my Mom I was really a girl, but she did not handle that well and told me it was wrong to feel and talk like That and to never do it again. I have always been very sensitive and I did not want to be "bad" and say the wrong thing so I stuffed my feelings deep down inside. That was 1966 and my parents/society did not have the education and awareness that they do today regarding trans people and my family was never open to the possibility that I might be trans, but they did not understand themselves. My parents thought I might be gay and told me I was not a girl, and not to wear dresses, because boy's don't wear dresses and I was a boy!! Fast forward to puberty, I was cross dressing very frequently and loved to dress up and walk around my neighborhood. I delivered newspapers to earn money and started a female wardrobe of my own, and when I was 15, my parents caught me en femme. I had fell asleep on the living room couch and They walked in returning from an evening out. They made me see a psychiatrist who I did not like and refused to talk to, he labeled me a sexual deviate transvestite. I still hate that label!! I learned from that experience that I would need to hide my cross dressing from my family and so I took it out of the house. I am very Pansexual and it didn't take me long to find out that there are men in the world who are attracted to a young cross dresser and I started to frequent XXX movie theaters and book stores in downtown Detroit, where I was born. Looking back on that time in my life I think I was really searching for Love and Acceptance, something I did not get at home. I was very cute and feminine in those days and had very, very long and thick blond hair so I became very popular and I Loved the attention I got from the guys. When I turned 23 I moved to Tampa, Florida where I began living my life as a girl. SR S was not a option for me as it was still extremely expensive and I had no money or insurance. Besides, I was having too much fun at the time to rock the boat. I met and fell in love with a transsexual girl and we stayed together for about 5 yrs. During this time she helped me to perfect "Brenda's look , attitude and confidence. (If you really want to pass you "Must" develop confidence as a woman and be able to let people see and feel your confidence). We also did a lot of sexual experimentation at the time with other t-girls, CDers, did men and woman. It's amazing how many people are attracted to t-girls!! Eventually we broke up and one evening I went to the corner red neck bar near my home where I was well known. I met a really cute guy who was playing pool with his friends and we were all over one another. His two friends left and my cute guy invited me to his place for a drink and I left with him. We were in Tarp on Springs, Florida in Brownie's Bar, a old house boat on the Anclote River turned into a bar. We drove thru Orange groves following the river up stream until we came to a very dark house that sat all by itself on the edge of the Orange grove. We got out of his pick up and walked up to the front door of the house and he produced a key unlocking the door and motioned for me to enter. Now, I was very drunk, I was "in heat" wanting this guy, and I was not making good decisions. I stepped thru the door into the pitch black house when I felt something hit me in the head!! I fell to the floor, in incredible pain as the lights came on. It was then I realized his two friends were in the house waiting me to enter and all three guys began kicking my ass. They were beating me only because I was trans. The boots, the blows continued without a break. I curled up into the fetal position and begged them to stop!! The pain was unbearable!!! It seemed to go on forever. In time I was going in and out of it, I thought I was gonna die!! They tossed my body into the back of the pick up truck and drove back to the bar, drinking beer and laughing the whole way. There was tall grass around the parking lot of the bar and that's where they deposited my body as food for the alligators. Luckily for me, a couple found me and called for an ambulance and I was taken to the hospital. I survived this hate crime with a hole in my head, broken nose and jaw, two broken ribs, cracked pelvis, broken arm, collapsed lung where I was stabbed in the chest. I still have a large scar on my cheek, several on my chin, a large scar on my chest and belly that I will carry for the rest of my life. It is NOT always easy to be different !!! Being Trans is not easy. I healed from this experience but it also scared me to death!! I moved back to Michigan to live with my parents while I got my life together but my stay with them was conditional, "No living as a girl!!" I agreed to their terms and over time I healed from the beating but I told myself, " Never Again"!! I purged everything and I decided to become the meanest, toughest man on the planet and began power lifting, injecting steroids & testosterone and in time joined a outlaw M/C. (Won't openly say who). For 23 years I became an absolute miserable, drug and alcohol Asshole who was unable to have a kind words for anyone. I was successful economically but empty inside. Then I met Nancy, my life partner. She was an absolute angel, she loved everyone and soon I was "calming down". I accidentally came across CDH and after reading some of the articles my curiosity was up. I spoke to a few of the girls and within two weeks I told Nancy my complete past and told her I wanted to try dressing again, just for fun. But once I started it woke up the feminine me and I was hooked, but differently this time. I decided to go into therapy with a gender therapist and it was not long before I realized I needed to transition, without a doubt!!. Also, Immediately I was going out en femme, with Nancy's support I was completely confident in every decision I made. I began HR T and although I have natural, small breasts, I am now going to get my breast implants. I live, work and dress as a woman everyday and since I began, I have never looked back or regretted my decision to do so. Cross dressing was never sexually stimulating in itself for me, instead it was the expression of who I really was that made me feel so good. I now know that I should have been born a girl so although I'm a little late, I am doing SR S so I feel whole. Unfortunately I must pay $$ for mine so it will be a process, but I am very motivated. I have had several set backs, ecology in my bones, open heart surgery, diabetic complications and I lost my Nancy as she passed away 3/2020. Her passing was the hardest, we were together for 24 years and she was my only family and support. However, I still have my home, my business and my little shit zu dog, Jasper. And time heals almost everything. Obviously, I am much older than I was when I lived in Florida and my long, pretty hair is no more, my cute face now looks more like my father's than my mothers. I no longer have the wild sex life that I had in those days, in fact, what's sex?!! LoL But, I am a much "better" person than I once was!! I am now kind, considerate, helpful, supportive to others, I now talk to strangers in the check out at stores, I am very open that I am trans and have fully "come out" without regret. I am no longer selfish or self centered, I love to share my feelings, emotions and do all I can to help and support others!! Growing older is not always fun and being a CDer, Trans person is not easy!! But one thing I learned was to Love and Appreciate your family and freinds. Treat strangers as you would like to be treated and never allow Anyone, (family, spouse), Not anyone dictate to you who you are and how to express the person inside your body. When we allow other people to tell us how to live, we are not fully expressing ourselves and we become unhappy, resentfull, angry and full of hate. Don't self destruct. Be You!!!Your To anyone in need, I do help girls privately free of charge over the phone regarding CD/Trans issues as possible. If your experiencing a problem, please feel free to PM me!!😊😊 P.S. I retired my name "Brenda" last year when I applied in court for my name change. Too much history associated with that name. I am Breanna Leigh West and I live in East Valley, Phoenix, Arizona

Latest posts by Breanna Leigh (see all)

    0 0 vote
    Article Rating
    Subscribe
    Notify of
    0 Comments
    Inline Feedbacks
    View all comments

    ©2020 Transgender Heaven | Privacy | Terms of Service | Contact Vanessa | Affiliate

    0
    Would love your thoughts, please comment.x
    ()
    x
    Subscribe To Our Newsletter

    Subscribe To Our Newsletter

    Join our mailing list to receive the latest news and updates from Transgender Heaven.

    You have Successfully Subscribed!

    Log in with your credentials

    or    

    Forgot your details?

    Create Account