This has taken 65 of my years to get to the point of writing this. This is a compendium of all my thoughts on the subject from birth to now. And I have chosen a question and answer as my presentation format.
Well, it appears it is time to get up and get dressed. What are you wearing today? I don’t know. Let’s see, do I feel like pants and a top, or maybe a dress with pumps, or that new skirt and blouse ensemble I bought…
Wait, you can’t wear anything but pants and a shirt! Why? I should be able to. There is nothing that says I can’t. No laws that I am aware of which say would be broken. As you see it, only half of the population can make the decision I mentioned, and you say that I can’t have that same right. Isn’t that wrong?
No. That’s just what society feels is normal. Wow, I didn’t realize that. Was there a committee meeting, or a pamphlet sent out? Maybe a notice was posted in the newspaper. Did I miss a recent court ruling? Did they issue an Executive Order?
No. It’s just the way things have always been. Always been? Since when? It wasn’t all that long ago when women could never wear pants anywhere, let alone to the office. And don’t even start on the historical aspects. Or on beach attire for that matter. Well, I think the skirt and blouse will look good today, and it’s warm out, so sandals as well.
Wait. You’re going out dressed like that! You’ll look like a… Nope. Stop. You don’t even want to think to go there. I’m going out dressed in what makes me feel good. Just as you plan your daily attire to be comfortable, so do I. And you certainly can’t expect me to be treated to any less than what you are treated. Sometime today, I will pack for my trip to the beach. I picked out some nice swimsuits yesterday at the store. One is a really nice yellow halter top two-piece.
You should just be wearing swim trunks. Again, I can wear what I feel is comfortable. If all I wore were trunks, then they’d want to arrest me for being topless. Of course, if you did that, then you’d be admitting I was female. But you as much as contend you don’t think I am. Don’t you think it is about time you figure out what you think?
And while you are doing all this thinking, figure out all this bathroom stuff as well. I know that is high on your agenda so get back to me. Remember this, the toilet fixtures in bathrooms are the same. They are in my house, and the same in public accommodations as well. I don’t know what you all do in yours, but in mine, I go to the bathroom, wash my hands, and make sure I look presentable. So, I’m not sure what you think some others do in there.
Get back to me and let me know because all I want to do is live my life as you live yours. I want to be free of fear, to be able to speak my mind, to enjoy my life, to explore and learn new things, to experience each sunrise and sunset, and to feel safe and secure.
And just maybe someday you and I will meet at some café somewhere, on a bright sunny morning, have a cup of coffee, and chat and laugh about how silly the world used to be. With you as you, and me as me. With no more preconceived notions or expectations about what either of us expects the other to be. As we chat, we will learn more from each other and about each other.
And as the sunset turns to evening we will part knowing each of us is better for meeting as equals and not as the adversaries others try to keep us as. When we get home, I suspect we will tell others about this wonderful new person we met today. Before you know it, a simple cup of coffee will have changed the world!