Yes, it’s a problem. Our couple counselor said yesterday that we have to watch how much guilt we allow in our minds. It doesn’t help solve the problems after a while. Some healthy guilt is good I suppose – it proves we aren’t sociopaths (giggle)!
I’m glad your wife will FT with you. WHen she brings up HRT, just be honest with her. If you’re not sure, say so. If you are, tell her it is essential to your mental and emotional health. I’m sure deep down she just wants what’s best for you. Make sure you have good counsel from a professional so you fully understand and accept what that is. I also agree in large part with Miriya’s comments here. Being far apart won’t help things, except in the short term it does give your wife safe space and time to figure out what she really needs as well. My wife wanted us to have separate bedrooms for her sake, and it’s not been ideal, but it’s not as bad as I thought. If she does come down to Florida, and you can arrange it, offer her separate space so she can adjust.
Good luck, and keep us posted! We care!!!