Abby, welcome to TGH.
I faced a similar dilemma about 25 yrs ago with a 1 yo and 5 yo.Β Not having the support mechanisms of today I chose to suppress my true self.Β Yes, I was able to do so and raise my children to adulthood, but I became a shell in the process.Β The true me was wrapped up like a powder keg inside my hard shelled cocoon.Β Once the kids were out of the house I started to re-awaken, but a series of circumstances led to the most stress I had ever faced in my life and I began to explode and worse yet at my family.Β In the end it was what was necessary for me to come out and finally be happy.Β It cost me a marriage and more, but what I learned was that I really wasn’t making my family happy, I was just making them stable all those years.Β You can’t make someone happy of you aren’t yourself.Β I implore you to keep working with your therapist to figure out the best solution in your life.Β I wish I had done it so long ago.Β You can PM me if you like.
Hugs, Ambassador Cloe
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