Abby, welcome to TGH.
I faced a similar dilemma about 25 yrs ago with a 1 yo and 5 yo. Not having the support mechanisms of today I chose to suppress my true self. Yes, I was able to do so and raise my children to adulthood, but I became a shell in the process. The true me was wrapped up like a powder keg inside my hard shelled cocoon. Once the kids were out of the house I started to re-awaken, but a series of circumstances led to the most stress I had ever faced in my life and I began to explode and worse yet at my family. In the end it was what was necessary for me to come out and finally be happy. It cost me a marriage and more, but what I learned was that I really wasn’t making my family happy, I was just making them stable all those years. You can’t make someone happy of you aren’t yourself. I implore you to keep working with your therapist to figure out the best solution in your life. I wish I had done it so long ago. You can PM me if you like.
Hugs, Ambassador Cloe