Reply To: Shame a simple word but very powerful

[Cynthia Dubois]

Have I felt shame buying woman’s clothes?  No.  Why would I?  I’m a woman, and I wear clothes.  Have people tried to shame me for buying woman’s clothes- sure.  There are plenty of people who are still invested in a worldview where gender is strictly policed and enforced.  Growing up I was expected to display masculine traits.  However, I never felt masculine, and was the type of person who was too stubborn to care what other people expected of me when I knew that what they wanted was not for my best interest, but was just to preserve some silly status quo they had invented to keep their worldview the way they wanted it to be.  Early on I decided that I couldn’t be locked into doing something that was literally psychologically scarring to me.  The only shame I ever felt over woman’s clothing was the shame I felt for having to be brought up and having to live in such an intolerant climate that sacrificed a child’s self-confidence and well being so they could “fit in.”