Intro and questions

[Lila Evans]

Hello people I am reasonably new to this world. I have been feminine my whole life but, I have never felt so clear as even I dress up and go out.

So yesterday I went out to Walmart. I was walking to the exit and I passed a small boy who looked at me and asked us that a man??? I just kept waking and didn’t say anything. When I first went into the store a group of dudes were pointing at me and laughing. So do I really look that bag or do I not notice it when I’m not dressed up. If there is a way to post pictures I would.

4 users thanked author for this post.

Bobbi Waitt, Toni Floria, 𝕋𝕖𝕣𝕣𝕚 𝔸𝕟𝕟𝕖🌸, Shiloh Rose

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[𝕋𝕖𝕣𝕣𝕚 𝔸𝕟𝕟𝕖🌸]

Hello Lila,

Welcome to our amazing CrossDresserHeaven (CDH) site. So glad you have joined us here. Feel free to explore all that our site has to offer.
The Warmth, Compaasion and Hospitality of our community members can be found throughout the site.
Please do make use of the forums and articles or public chat room and friendships offered here on CrosDresser Heaven.
At any Membership level, You can contact any of us via [ PM ] Private Messages. You can find that link on each member’s Wall under their Profile picture.
Also, you may find what you need such as Help Center or Ambassadors by using the links in the top R/H drop down 3 bar [ hamburger ] menu.
Here is a good link to review the membership levels and the privledges for each. Such as Private Chat, Groups, etc.

Regards,
Terri Anne, Ambassador

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[Lila Evans]

I don’t know how I replied before you posted it if the posts are out if order. Thanks to everyone.

[DeeAnn Hopings]

There are 2 things going on. Replies slot in under the referenced post, but if the box at the bottom is used directly as a general reply to the thread, it will go right after the original message. There is also a strange thing that happens with the timing. I get notifications that a reply to one of my messages was, say, 7 hours ago but in actuality it was an hour. My guess is that time zones are not being handled correctly by the software or there is an incorrect setting.

No biggie; just a minor annoyance…

[Shiloh Rose]

Lila,
It can be hard to get out and be seen. We have no control over how others act or react. We have a lot of control over how we dress and carry ourselves.
And yet even though we can do our best it does not mean all will go well.
At times it will come down to how we choose to deal with a situation, I try to always remember that we represent TG I have to try to make the best of that moment.
When I first came out I had no wigs, makeup, forms, etc.
I still don’t have much, but I have been given much encouragement from cis females.
I have watched as support has come from people I never thought it would.
Hang in there. Don’t give up.
We are all here for you.
I am happy to help and talk any time.
Shiloh Rose

[Lila Evans]

Deeann thanks for your reply. I noticed in a selfy I took that I don’t look believable enough.

I’m bald. My wig looks fake, and I was leaning on the fact that do many women are wearing wigs but this just looks like fake hair.

I can’t figure out what wig to buy, I don’t have a huge budget. You’d think having curves and breasts would be enough but the face is everything and I don’t look it.

[DeeAnn Hopings]

Lila:

What I would say is that people are downright strange. I don’t have a clue as to what visual clues they are looking at. Whenever I leave my house, I am always nicely dressed, including jewelry, makeup, heels and quite noticeable  breast forms. I am not a large person, yet I’ve been misgendered while wearing a mask and BEFORE I speak. I confess that I clearly don’t understand.

While I do have a couple of nice wigs, they are really not compatible with desert weather. It also requires that my wife helps me with them due to arthritis. Some years ago my solution was to start wearing hats and sometimes baseball caps. The last time that I wore a wig was to a gala event in December of 2019.

There are a number of online wig sellers. I think his is the store I last purchased from:

https://www.thewigcompany.com/

I am no expert, but I think sometimes wigs may need a bit of styling and shaping. I’m guessing that the last wig that I bought was about 7 years ago and maybe in the $60 to $80 dollar range, but I have no idea as to how that would translate to today in terms of pricing, construction, etc. A couple of other things to think about would be coloring and if any gray is desired.

I suspect that if you have any wig sellers in your area, an in person visit would be helpful…

[DeeAnn Hopings]

Lila:

Very happy that you found us and I hope it will be beneficial for your journey.

I understand your story as something similar happened to me. There is a chain of thrift stores that I like called SAVERS. We don’t have one anywhere  here in the Coachella Valley. The closest one is in Riverside and I visit periodically. As I was getting out of my car, a family walked by. The father had the hand of the older one and the mother was carrying the younger one. The younger once said: “Mommy, is that a boy or a girl?”. Without hesitation or breaking stride the mother said, “It’s a girl”.

I think it is important to realize what you can control and what you can’t. You can’t control what the opinions of others are, but you can control how you look, how you react and your deportment.

Isolation is a problem for many trans people and I get the impression that you are not attached to any community. Many are doing support groups and social gatherings over ZOOM these days so you may not have to be that close.

I encourage you to complete your Profile page. When filled out, there’s a lot of information that will help other members understand you better. You will always be able to get to your page and it can be updated at any time.

You may search for members in your area by clicking on Social in the menu and then Member Directory.

[Author]

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