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Its been a while since I have posted my thoughts. So if you are reading this, understand that I am not a typical transgender person. If I am to be considered transgender at all. But yet her I am, comfortable here on a safe place for me to express myself.
Gender Dysphoria: I have put maybe to much thought into this concept, just to realize something. I feel maybe we are forced to believe that somehow, the way we are is a mental issue. When in fact its just a ordinary part of evolution. I think those who think we are not mentally sane, force us or me, to believe we are mental. Thinking about it, my depression is mainly cause I can’t mental accept that I am just a normal human being. If I was not trying so hard to be someone else all my life, I would likely see life differently. Because truthfully, at sometime in you past haven’t you wished to be normal like everyone else pretending to be normal. So in conclusion to this thought about gender dysphoria, there is no such thing, its just something people who can accept the truth, that not everything is as simple as male or female.
I could probably go on and on about things. But for now, I want to touch on something else that bothers me. I have searched my memories for every little event where I could say I did something to present feminine. And I, from all that wasted time, can say, I don”t need to convince myself that there was sign or some sorts. I notice when I joined CDH, it seemed like I was trying to convince myself and others that I was genuine. Think it was just a stage of acceptance that I need to go through. I understand now that though I am not born with a choice to be transgender, the only choice i made was to stop living with limitations of what I can do or be.
I hate long posts so I I will close this one. I speak for myself but many or just some of you may relate. So a little advice, Be yourself and write about how you feel. There is no need to convince me or anyone else that you had to live in a hell most your life to be what society wanted you or me to be.
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