Please Help Me

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    • #5213

      Hi I’m shelby

      Let me start by telling you a bit about myself. I’m a single parent to a wonderful little boy named spencer. I’m 23, single, kind of a go with the flow type. I have an awesome family, am aspiring to be a novelist, and love to read.

      Lately I’ve start having these thoughts, about what it would be like if i’d been born a man. I’m not sure why……I don’t want to offend anyone or anything I just want to know if this is normal. I know i’m attracted to guys believe me i couldn’t date a girl if i tried, but I kind of want to……I really shouldn’t say this on here…but i want to have sex with a guy….not have him have sex me.

      I couldn’t tell you if that’s because sex isn’t fun for me naturally or what but if theres at least one thing I know about myself it’s that I’m into guys.

      I’ve started having these dreams recently as well….dreams about being a guy. I seem happier in them. I’m not sure what this is. Is it just a faze? Am i trans? Or just confused.

      Please help me……

      It isn’t only my life at stake here. I have a son. I need to know what I’m going through before I open anyone up to anything like this.


    • #5227

      Shelby, I think you’ll find your not alone in your thoughts.Β  The answer to your questions is complex, more so that I think a poll can reveal.Β  The answer must come from within if you are to ever be satisfied that it is right for you.
      Just know there is a whole community here willing to support you.Β  While your thoughts may not be mainstream or fit in with others beliefs, they are yours and worthy of consideration.

    • #5288

      Hi Shelby, I agree that this is a complex issue, but also want to assure you your thoughts are completely ‘normal’. No one should judge you for them, least of all you. I think many here have had the same thought process you outline. And, while I agree with Cloe 100%, that the issue is too complex for a poll, I just want to say you’re in the right place to talk it out and whether or not you feel you are ‘truly’ transgender, and whether or not that leads to you transitioning or simply leads to a greater awareness of your true self, continuing to explore the topic is of great value. I would suggest seeing a therapist, if you can at all. It can be terrifying to speak to someone in person about this, but my therapist has helped me come to peace with who I am and my desires. Finally, one thing I strongly feel you are not is ‘confused’. You are curious, maybe, or seeking answers, but I don’t think that’s confused. What you are feeling is healthy and normal. Best of luck to you!

    • #5603

      hi shelby, i agree 100% with cloe and melissa.Β  while i think your answer has to come from within i do not think you are confused at all, just curious.Β  i too have often wondered what it would be like had i been born a woman.Β  i guess that is just as ‘strange’, but even tho i am bi, i still consider myself all male.

    • #5618

      Hi Shelby. You have come to the right pplace! Β It is not uncommon for female/male to wonder what it would be like to be the opposite sex. I have done a lot of mentoring in this area and if you like….we can chat privately about your feelings. Just let me know by return and I will explain a lot of things to uou…..It is really too a long of a subject to discuss on forums. Do let me know….look forward to being of assistance. Dame Veronica.

    • #6286

      Hi Shelby,

      I am in agreement %100 with the replies so far. Curious not confused and if possible visiting a counselor who specializes in transgender counseling will help you figure this out. If that is not possible I would strongly recommend chatting with Dame Veronica to get some guidance. She is an amazing lady and has a wealth of knowledge as well as having quite a bit of experience to help you with. A poll at this point is too simplistic for getting a picture of you and if you are transgender. I do hope you can explore the road to self realization which is the journey we are all on here in this community so please ask questions and do not feel you are alone in your thoughts. I believe that I should have been born female but I am in a male body. The road we travel is similar while the outcome will be different but that does not make communication exclusive for only F to M or M to F. You took the first step and it is a big one when you joined this site and since you are here you may as well ask yourself; if I don’t talk to someone or ask questions will I ever truly know who I am or which gender I should be? The dilemma is large and foreboding but it can be made easier with help. Many hands make work easier. Relax, think about this, ask questions, talk with Veronica or a counselor, and the answers you seek should present themselves to you in time. TTFNπŸ’‹πŸ‘ 




    • #110540

      Shelby, I’m 65, and I have not figured it out yet either!

    • #110563

      HelloΒ  my name is Maries I am 63 male and have had fantasies of cross dressing for a very long time too. I have not done it in some time that’s what brings be to this forum I want to discover if I could be Transgender or just a crossdressing male? I have never really been out in public and have not dressed in a very long time. Will try and put something together and post a picture of myself soon. Thanks for listening to me I am new here by the way just found you today:-)

      • #110565
        DeeAnn Hopings


        Understand that this thread is nearly 3 years old and it is the only thread started by this member…

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