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I currently am trying to keep my dysphoria in a stranglehold. I live within a housing program which separates the men from the women and I’m unsure they have any experience with TG folks at all. About 15 years ago, I started having serious doubts of my own personhood.
Long story short, my father set a horrible example for me. I had the wrong reasons for wanting to transition and what not. After being in & out of the mental health system for most of my adult life I can see how little regard the regular “crazy” or “sad” people get from professionals.
I was driven home and for some reason this idiot kept asking “where do the girls live?” He wouldn’t shut up about it. I tried to direct the driver how to get to the proper street where I lived on. Let’s just say the women live on the other side of the development. I kinda said “I’m a guy, why the heck does it matter where the women are at?”
Being in denial is one thing, having to conform to this binary way of thinking is another. For most of my life I had to ID as a dude when other dudes are too strange to me. I don’t act like them… oh well. TLDR, I just can’t help but wish for a change.
EDIT: Ugh. How did that photo get in there? I didn’t upload it. But, yah, that’s what I look like even though I consider myself trans. I have no feminine photos. 🙁
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