Transgender Think Tank (TTT)…

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    • #136671
      DeeAnn Hopings

      As we all know, the transgender community is under attack in MANY ways, such as bathroom usage, preventing gender related healthcare, preventing the use of appropriate pronouns, forcing detransition, etc. What I want to set the stage for some free thinking and see what thoughts bubble to the surface. This will be an attempt to cast a broad net with no restrictions on where the ideas come from.

      The Question:

      Given that our beloved community of transgender people (in the broadest sense of the word) is under relentless attack by those who believe there is something wrong with us, what are some ways that we may counteract this? In other words, how do we fight back?

      Not expecting miracles and remember that there are no wrong answers here. Let’s see your best thinking!

      • This topic was modified 1 year ago by Jasmine. Reason: moved to appropriate forum
    • #136672


      There are all kinds of political actions we can take, the most basic of which is to be informed and vote for candidates that pledge to protect and support our human rights. But I think even more fundamental than that is to stand up and be supportive in our personal and social lives — use appropriate pronouns, let other trans people (especially, especially kids) know that we love and support them and will defend them if necessary, be open and vocal about trans rights, dignity, and acceptance in our social interactions, etc. A little example goes a long way.


      • #136726

        For years I tried to use a hypothetical situation as an example to maybe help  others understand we in the ‘other’ world are just people trying to get through life the best we know how, without fears, hatred, and violence, just like everyone else and that we all are in this together.

        A high ranking politician making a name for them self  is headed to an anti LGBT rally to show their support and are involved in a major accident. Police are notified, ambulance is arriving. Things don’t look good at all. The ambulance driver looks the person in the eyes and says, “ I must inform you, you will die in minutes unless you let us save your life now. I need to tell you I’m gay, and my assistant is transgender. We can save your life now or if you choose, let you die right here.  So, what’ll be?”

        The frustrating part of change is it’s slow coming. We can have parades, interviews, law suits, protests, etc, but nothing we do will move the issue along faster. I think educations at the grassroots level, media interviews and discussions will keep the wheels rolling. As for a magic pill to solve it all? Not in my lifetime sadly.


        • This reply was modified 1 year ago by Jill Lacey.
        • #136729
          DeeAnn Hopings

          I understand your logic, but there are some people out there who reside at the intersection of ignorance and stupidity. Case in point: in the early days of the ACA an elderly man, who was vehemently opposed to the existence of the ACA, was saved from dying due the medical intervention he received that was funded through the ACA. After he recovered, he was STILL opposed to the legislation and as he stated, he would have been OK if they had let hime die.

          That’s how deep BS runs…

          • #136733

            Seems it’s always people like him that get the headlines instead of how important the ACA is.

          • #137448

            Back when there was all the media coverage over the political/legal/public fight over the Affordable Care Act – which those in opposition called it “Obamacare” (what was supposed to be a negative label to generate support against the ACA, has now become THE way to refer to the ACA!), there were some College Students to went to go interview those people, and many of them were vehemently against “that Obamacare” – but when the ACA was mentioned, many of them liked the Affordable Care Act, they just hated “Obamacare”!

            So to these people:  Obamacare = hate it – ACA = It’s not so bad, maybe even good.  NOT realizing that their hated “Obamacare” WAS the Affordable Care Act that they actually liked!

            They make NO SENSE to me!

          • #137458
            DeeAnn Hopings

            Yes, I remember that. Also, there were many who didn’t know what the ACA was at all!

            Anyway, this does make sense, to a degree, anyway. This is bias at work. These folks were the ones who “knew” Obama was bad. Therefore, by extension, anything that he was even remotely connected to must be bad also.

        • #136811
          DeeAnn Hopings


          Isn’t it ironic that back in 2017 a Black lesbian Special Agent saved the lives of Republican members of congress when they were attacked during a baseball practice in Alexandria, VA. Afterwards, those members continued their anti-LGBT BS as well as their lack of support for effective gun legislation in order to try to prevent mass shootings.

          Once again, dogma over reason…

          • #136821

            And it continues on a daily basis. Someone needs to ask these people, “why?” How can equal rights and acceptance  harm you and what do you have to gain, or lose, by being “anti”?

          • #136845
            DeeAnn Hopings

            Red Meat to The Faithful…

    • #136674

      Tough one.  The motivations to be ‘anti’ are in many cases, based on religious and political interests. We have a zillion organizations worldwide doing what they can. Lately, it’s been one step forward, two steps back. Personally I doubt the stats that estimate the number of LGBT people worldwide. I suspect it to be much higher simply because the estimate of individuals in the closet is much higher than thought. Still, we represent a small percentage of the total population, but big enough to have clout. My hope is more LGBT get involved in politics, in high positions, where they can make a difference, educate fellow politicians, teach others we all have the same rights. Even at our level as nobodies, we can try to educate others simply by discussing issues related to equality, etc. Invite local authoritative individuals to LGBT events in our local areas, get in the media’s face. We don’t have to present en femme to fight for the rights of the LGBT communities. So being in a closet is irrelevant when it comes to taking a position.
      Shaming someone has had results. Picketing outside individuals residences peacefully draws a lot of positive attention and the media love it. Not my favorite but it does work.
      ‘Anti’ individuals who are good talkers, have the ability to mask the truth as something it isn’t to satisfy their supporters. They need to be called out and forced to provide the hard evidence behind their statements which, as we know, they cannot do. Matters not short term as they continue the lies. Unless we continue to call them out, they will gain supporters to their false claims.

      I suppose this post might get me in shit. Oh well, life goes on.


    • #136760

      I think just being me everywhere is my most powerful tool.   I ask myself what “they” can do to me….arrest Me?  Arrest us All?  If so, I hope they’re prepared to have the court system swamped with TG/CD cases.  Wouldn’t that be a spectacle!!!

      Ms. Rosa Park rode a public bus to get to her destination.   She proved that legal discrimination of that sort doesn’t work today.

      • #140215
        DeeAnn Hopings

        No, they can make gender affirming care illegal. They can force people to use restrooms according to their birth sex. They can make HRT drugs illegal. They can enforce no name changes for government documents. There are places creating legislation to force trans people to detransition as we speak.

    • #136786

      History had seen its fair share of scapegoating.  Whenever the Czar wanted to draw attention from bleeding his subjects, that was a good time for an old fashioned pogrom against “them”.  Quiescence is seen as weakness.  There is power in numbers, so IMHO being out there to make allies… to show the world we’re not going anywhere except where we want to go, is important.  Persistence of an idea  is what historically leads to societal change.  I’ve heard the conversations of coworkers and family who decry how society is changing, and how that unsettles them.  Obviously those who came before us have already made a difference.

    • #136860
      Dana Munson

      What to do to fight against the anti-LBGTQ BS????  Well, as I live in southern California, and have experienced only remarkable tolerance and acceptance around here since I commenced my transition, the issue is less than pressing from a purely personal standpoint.  But I certainly can grasp the anxiety that other, less fortunately situated folks feel.  So I give $$$ to organizations fighting our fight.  And I damn sure never donate to or vote for any political creature who trails an “R-[somewhere]” description after his/her name! I don’t even care to hear what their personal stance on LBGTQ matters might be – it doesn’t matter in the least, since they adhere to a party that has gone almost completely toxic. I will not enable them.

    • #137449

      This has been a quandary for me – “To be or not to be… a Trans Activist”.

      Activist throughout history have had all manner of ill-will, violence and never experienced ANY peace for the rest of their lives!  Activists are constantly targeted and have every manner of legal (and illegal) troubles that they have to live through.

      But WHO are the ones that get the results?  The ones who organize, publicly march, protest, make loud public speeches – the one’s who put their faces in front of cameras, their voices through microphones and megaphones, and keep getting into “good trouble” to get their point across.  Sometimes you have to “get in the face” of this hatred and ‘force’ them to notice you – the proverbial “banging one’s head against the wall” comes to mind!  Repetition after many hundreds of hours and days may start to crack that shell of ignorance in these anti-Trans people – or those that may not be “anti-Trans” but bury their heads in the sand so they don’t hear about it.  We also have to battle those that just don’t want to hear about us, don’t want to be uncomfortable or “get involved” even passively, so they want us (Transgender people) to “just go away”, thus tuning us (and our supporters) out, and allowing the extremists to win.

      There’s a part of me who wants to scream from the highest mountain against all this crap going on, but there’s also the main part of me who doesn’t want to “rock the boat” – who just wants to live a normal, quiet, peaceful life.  I am an admitted introvert and am probably in the “Social Anxiety Spectrum” – I do NOT like to draw attention to myself in ANY way.  Whether I was living as a male or trying to live my life as female, I just want to be left alone – in peace.

      BUT… how do we get people on our side?  By letting all those people know who real transgender people are.  Let the average person know that they know a Trans-person.  I believe that was one of the ways that Harvey Milk got hetero-citizens to back him and the gay community to stop anti-gay legislation: he got his fellow gays to contact their family, friends, employers, etc. and let them know that they were gay – and he got LOUD, got public, and ran for public office.

      So, is the entire Trans community all over the United States and beyond, going to stand up and declare “I am here, and I’m Trans”?  From my own personal experience, many of the transgender folks I’ve met through my peer support group just want to be treated like any other female (or male for Trans-males) and do NOT want to stand out as Transgender.  They want everyone to think of them as “just another woman” or “just another man”, and NOT as a Trans-woman or Trans-man.  Go to a job, go to the store, go to an entertainment venue, go to a FAMILY GATHERING – just as the gender they transitioned to.

      So, off of my long-winded, rambling, lack-of-proper-sleep-and-nutrition post here, what do others suggest we do to get the point across to family, friends, and the general populous that we’re no threat to them, their children or to ourselves – that is, if we’re treated with respect, dignity, and are given the same freedoms as every other American?  Because when your rejected by your family, friends, colleagues, community and fellow citizens, it doesn’t promote a “healthy life”, both physically and especially mentally, for those that have be ostracized (10-time more likely to have a trans-suicide when there’s no support from blood-related family)

      Okay, I need to get some sleep!! Goodnight!

      • #137459
        DeeAnn Hopings

        There’s something that I think many people do not understand. The assumption is that everything that needs doing in the trans community requires one to be visible to the general public. This Is Not True. There’s doing the mailings, doing the E-mails, setting up and maintaining computers, taking care of the finances and bookkeeping, etc. In the past, and on another forum, I’ve made this point to people. However, the conversation stops because I suspect that they realize that they have run out of excuses. Unfortunately, they don’t realize that they are the beneficiaries of the work that activists do without even lifting a finger.

        Sadly, that is the truth of it.

    • #137450

      I um hear the hate, n when I walk the street as missy, I’m still 5 10 but as missy I’m alert n afraid of oncoming attacks by those who dont know me or care, they just know they want to hurt me n those like me for fun, because we’re different. jerks


      this reminds me of 1942 Germany when a psycho with a funny mustache exterminated 6 million Jewish people, some Christians, handicapped persons n those thought to be that he could keep Germany pure…what à tragic joke. and yet the lesson is the same  we don’t like you because, so we can take away your medical care or do this and that to you, just because.

      what they forget is we came to this country hundreds of years ago to avoid a government run by the church,  to avoid prosecution fir speaking your mind, to avoid prosecution for simply being different. and now…

      the new legislations  if anyone wouldc shut up long enough to listen, probably violate the constitution in so many ways its not funny. yet why ruin a good witch hunt with law or facts

      sad. makes you want to move n happy we don’t live forever. I recall the scene from the Godfather where Tom hagen talks to frankie pantagalene after he tried to have Don Michael  Corleon killed, we was like the Roman empire..we was…somewhere we have sadly forgotten what we fought n died for only to become the monster we tried to escape.

      I hope they challenge these laws in court as violating the constitution,  as void for vagueness, as contradicting other federal n state laws, as simply wrong n inhumane

      man is the only creature that kills fir sport..

      sad. sorry

    • #137495


      i simply don’t know. I wish i did. I wish we could brainstorm and find THE ANSWER but truth, sadly, is you cannot force people to be nice. Hence domestic violence and failed marriages. Every election period i watch a anti crime push by some incumbent, where they get the tv cameras to capture the police rounding up and arresting hookers on 40th.  Ok, well 3 hours later, most made bail and are ow working 30th street. That doesn’t make  the news. Sadly, the haters are better organized than us, better funded, and they don’t wish to remain anonymous, as many of us simply wanted to live as the man or woman we felt we truly are. Hate gets bigger headlines and sells more papers and airtime. Then there is the educate them so they feel badly and repent?

      well i have 2 siblings i told in tears how i struggled with this for years and need to express it and please don’t leave me. 1 has called me insane and possessed by the devil and swears that LGBT people are all going to hell, deep hell. He probably has never knowingly spoken to a LGBT person other than my telling him i am trans – and now he barely acknowledges me. So i am still the same person, perhaps nicer as missy, but he knows he hates me and my kind, without even having a real reason. Sort of like the child who “hates” broccoli, but has not even tasted it. Yes i think he is being ignorant, bigotted and small minded, hateful and i never fathomed he would pick a prayer groups interpretation over having supposedly loved me for years – but alas, he did, easily. The point is not my sad tale, we all have them, the point is he wont even speak to a trans person, let alone attend an event. So how can i show him, it doesn’t rub off if you hug me or shake my hand (kind of like we went through with racial discrimination)? i don’t know, and part of me doesn’t find the strength to fight the worlds hate. Part of me simply wants to keep walking forward until i find happiness. Last week i met a girl at a laundry mat and she ran back in after she was leaving and handed me her phone number, saying i enjoyed our visit, call me. Why would i waste time trying to educate haters, when it feels a lot nicer spending time with those who smile to us?

      The obvious answer is because if we don’t fight now, there will be no tomorrows. They are erasing us from history and making it illegal to be, talk, read about, or do anything remotely related to LGBT. ALL based on ignorance and hate. But why? I’ve hated others but only after the wound they gave me or my loved one was fresh. But we’ve done nothing to these people, yet they know they HATE US and NEED to ERASE US.

      sorry. so sorry.


    • #137510

      [quote quote=137450]I hope they challenge these laws in court as violating the constitution,[/quote]

      It was the argument that it was a constitutional right for women to have privacy to make their own medical decisions regarding terminating a pregnancy that was the basis of the “Roe v. Wade” SCOTUS decision.

      Look what happened to THAT!  I don’t have much faith in the courts these days.  :'(

    • #137517
      DeeAnn Hopings

      Toledo?!?! Top 10?!?! Holy Toledo, or words to that effect.

      That is REALLY surprising, but then again I gave not been there much after I left in 1990. Eventually as my close relatives passed away there were fewer and fewer reasons to go back. In more recent times, the last time I was there was in the Summer of 2018.

      Do you remember Bretz? It was a bar on the edge of the west side of downtown.

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