Whats in a name, second thoughts

New name for a new woman?

Name choice

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  • #82956
    Traci Lynn

    Hello and thanks for reading my question.


    My dead name was Tracyee Lynn, I went by Trace all my life as I hated my name. Yes thanks Mom for giving your son not just one, but two androgenous names. Upon starting transition, I decided to change the spelling but embrace my name.

    For me transitioning meant learning and accepting my new pronouns, at group support meeting I always introduce myself as Traci, and give the pronouns he becoming she. I just came out to my family, they live far from me. But after telling them about my transition I realized that I am not he becoming she. He is gone, there is only she. No matter what stage of transition she is in.

    So that made me think more, maybe she needs a new birth name and not a vestage from his. Does anyone have an opinion about that line of comptemplation, or do you think reinventing and embracing a name I never liked as a man may be fitting now?

    5 users thanked author for this post.
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  • Author
    • #84158
      Claire D


      If you don’t like the name, you don’t like the name. Have you asked your parents what they might’ve named you had you been AFAB?

    • #83481
      Jessica Ray


      Isn’t it lovely to be able to change your own name. Jessica was chosen by me and my partner chose Scarlett. It’s true your chosen names mean something so choose wisely. In any case Love to all reading

      Jessica Scarlett.

    • #83372
      Marianne Tornander


      There was no way to feminize either of my given names into a useful name so I had to come up with a fresh one. In my teenages I read a Swedish youth novel named Peter’s baby about a 15 year old boy becoming a father while still in school and deciding to fix his troublesome life and raise his daughter Lena alone in spite of parents and social workers wanting him to leave her off for adoption. The mother of the girl was named Marianne. Soon after giving birth she gave up the child and moved away to start anew. I often thought about her reasons and actions doing so and the name stuck in my memory. For many years I had no need for a name for my inside girl or female twin as I sometimes thought of her,  but once I let her out and try her own wings I understood she would sooner or later be questioned for her name. Thinking about alternatives, I came to think about Marianne and suddenly realized that apart from the initial consonant, it sounded quite close to my given name, without being in any way related. Coming to Sweden from France in the 18th century it has gained a steady popularity and can easily be found in any age group. Common enough not to trigger questions yet rare enough to suit a very special woman.

      For a second name to go with it I didn’t had to go far to find another very special woman in my life – my maternal grandmother Ellen. Of all persons, I believe she may have understood me most. I will never know for sure though,  as she died years before I set Marianne free.

      Ellen Marianne Tornander


      1 user thanked author for this post.
    • #83231
      Brittany Ryan


      I picked Brittany Ryan because I’ve  always loved Brittany Spears and wanted to look like her. And Ryan is in part of my dead name. Which isn’t exactly completely dead I I have to use it at work for now. But I can’t wait until it’s my only name.

      1 user thanked author for this post.
    • #83052
      Aria Bash


      I’ve loved music all my life.  I especially enjoyed the discipline of “Choral” type but also quartet too.  So, when I finally decided to feminize my name….   a couple of choices came up and I liked the sound and spelling of Aria… (pronounced R – E  – ah ).  So my hobby and life long love will stay and give me some peace of mind.

    • #83047
      Tiffany Alexis


      Pick a name you always wanted to have. Be yourself. It’s your life. My dead name is nothing like tiffany (it’s chris). I just really liked the name. Not like my dead name couldnt have been feminized. Had no problem with the name. Got along and still get along just fine with my parents. I just always thought of my ideal self as tiffany. My middle name is new too, it certainly wasn’t Alex.
      So if you don’t want to be Traci, don’t be. We only have one life to live. Be known, be remembered on your own terms.

      My heart is in the game

      1 user thanked author for this post.
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