Where I am now

[Melanie Penson]

Hello Folks

I can’t remember when I was last here, maybe 2 years ago? A lot has happened since then and I’m SO glad to be back.

I have had to stop working, mainly due to ill health but also total lack of support from my managers ( i’ve had 13 changes of manager in as many years). I felt that no-one was listening to me and no-one took my concerns seriously either. There was sure one lumpy carpet in my manager’s office!!

I’m still far too ill to work but it’s not all bad news; far from it. I have told my parents sbout my plans as Melanie; my dad at least took it rather well. Not so sure about Mum, she didn’t say anything but the look on her face told me she needs time to adjust to having a daughter.

I have also joined a local well-being cafe, a mental health drop in centre run by a local church ( that I have also joined). I’m volunteering at the cafe now and it is a total change from work. Everyone has time for everyone else, you are not expected to say “I’m fine” when you are clearly not. I have discovered that I have some talent for counselling so I’m working my way through a few guide books and have just enrolled on a mental health counselling taster course online.

But by far the best news is that I am totally accepted as Melanie, Female. I have made dome wonderfully supportive female friends to whom I’m ” one of the girls”, we have long chats about anything and they help me out with advice and tips. I’ve been dressing and living as a woman for just over 3 years now but only recently been going out in skirts and hosiery. It feels so liberating to be finally shaking free of my old, depressed and restrictive male life and entering the open, sjnlight world of womanhood.

Love and hugs from Melanie xx

 

[𝓜𝒾𝓈𝓈 𝓒𝓁ℴℯ́ 💋💋]

Hi Melanie. I certainly hope you are able to find the right medical care for your illness. What is really encouraging to see is how you turned some lemons into lemonade. I wish you all the best in finding your way in a counseling career and helping with well-being cafe. Helping others can be rewarding beyond measure. Most of all I’m glad you’re finding a way to be you.

Cloe Webb
Managing Ambassador
Transgender Heaven

[Melanie Penson]

Hi Cloe

Thanks for your response. I’m not going to pretend it’s easy, life is tough some days but I’m not going to give up now. I’m still some way off HRT, it might not happen until.next year now but I’ve waited 40-odd years to let Melanie out, a few more months won’t hurt and they’ll pass so quickly.

I still have crises of confidence, that I won’t “pass” or won’t be good enough to pass the counselling course. There are days when I can’t move for pain or that I can’t stop being sick. Then there are days when I feel so alive, sexy, feminine and exciting. When I just have to wear my best lingerie, stockings and a dress and it feels SO RIGHT. That I don’t care what anyone thinks, says or does.

I am so glad that I have supportive friends I can turn to for a virtual hug and a girly chat whenever I need one.

Xx from Melanie

 

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