I’m Fine – Coming to Terms with Depression; a Poem

I know there’s nothing wrong with me

I know that I’m just fine

Why should I have to think about

The dark clouds in my mind

 

Why would I choose to focus on

The pain I felt before

What’s done is done, the past is past

It doesn’t matter anymore

 

So what if I’m mad at my parents

For leaving me all on my own

So what if I hated my teachers

It’s not like they could have known

 

I know that there’s nothing wrong with me

I know that I’m just fine

Why would I want to think about

The dark clouds in my mind

 

Why would I choose to focus on

The pain I felt before

What’s done is done, the past is past

It doesn’t matter anymore

 

Maybe I’m just too sensitive

After all, I was being naïve

Shouldn’t I have known better, then to believe all the lies

About friendship and trauma and how passivity makes you wise

 

There’s nothing wrong with me

I’m fine

I get to choose to ignore

The dark clouds in my mind

 

Why would I focus on

The tricks I learned to play

It’s all been done, it’s in the past

It never mattered anyway

 

I loved myself at first

But slowly it sunk in

The aching hollow loneliness

Of never fitting in

 

I didn’t get the lessons

And I didn’t get the games

And over time the loneliness

Shifted into pain

 

So maybe something is wrong with me

Maybe I’m not fine

Maybe there’s something deeper taking its toll on me

A disconnect inside my mind

More Articles by Kris marts

    View all articles by Kris marts
    The following two tabs change content below.

    Kris marts

    My breasts grew in at age eleven, and with them my life became a walking nightmare, i feel uncomfortable in my skin, and in public, and when I move, or stand, or walk, or talk

    Latest posts by Kris marts (see all)

    Tags:
    0 0 votes
    Article Rating
    Subscribe
    Notify of
    2 Comments
    Inline Feedbacks
    View all comments
    LeslieAnne
    Member
    LeslieAnne (@leslieanne)
    12 days ago

    No , Kris , i am not fine either , i have contemplated not existing any more several times myself . Do i suffer depression ? , yes i guess so . To be or not to be that is the question end i quote . Will i die at my own hand due to being depressed ? , maybe one day . I live each day as it comes . Will i ever be loved ? , probably not . I confessed to a very close friend and he no longer calls me , i guess i scared him… Read more »

    Ally Smiley
    Ally Smiley (@allys)
    17 days ago

    you have no idea how much I connected to this. I’ve been depressed for years as well as been battling anxiety, and PTSD from my horrible childhood. I am so sorry that you have to go through this but know that you’re not alone. we are both a part of a community here that is not only supportive but also understanding. so we aren’t alone in this battle. I have met hundreds of people that have felt like they are, only to find out that they aren’t. if it helps, you can dm me if you need to talk whenever,… Read more »

    ©2021 Transgender Heaven | Privacy | Terms of Service | Contact Vanessa | Affiliate

    2
    0
    Would love your thoughts, please comment.x
    ()
    x
    Subscribe To Our Newsletter

    Subscribe To Our Newsletter

    Join our mailing list to receive the latest news and updates from Transgender Heaven.

    You have Successfully Subscribed!

    Log in with your credentials

    or    

    Forgot your details?

    Create Account

    If you don't see the captcha above please disable ad and tracking blockers and reload the page.