Back in June, 2019, I went down to New York City for the World Pride Parade/Celebration. It was so wonderful to be among others of the LGBTQIA+ Community and their supporters. And to see so many - and from outside of the U.S. - was very affirming and uplifting to me! I stayed until the Sun went down, leaving NYC while it was dark. Saw the upper-deck bridge near Grand Central Terminal lit up with rainbow colors - and saw the Tappan Zee Bridge (Governor Cuomo Bridge) also lit with Pride Colors!
With all that has happened since then, I would be very afraid to attend a Pride event in NYC again! Not only are LGBTQIA+ Community people being targeted, but law enforcement, service people (such as train conductors/operators, public service workers), and just everyday people trying to get around. I feel as though if World Pride were held this year in NYC, there would be massive anti-LGBTQ+ protests, violent outbursts and mob-fighting, a mass shooting or even a bombing at the event!
There is a marked increase in violence... heck, just plain evil, that's gripping not only the United States, but the world. It's like there's a "Silent World War III" happening: "Silent" meaning nobody has declared us in WWIII, but between the Ukraine/Russia War, Israel/Hamas/Gaza Strip War, and the posturing of other countries "sabre-rattling", it sure feels like it!
Then, you have the attacks on the Transgender community in the forms of legislation being put forth, and enacted, to strip us of our Freedoms, deny us proper healthcare, and our literature being banned from public view like it was triple-X bestiality pornography, makes me feel like I should dig a "Fallout Shelter" and hide there for the rest of my life!! Not to mention the assault on Women - or more importantly, stripping Women (of all ages) of bodily autonomy concerning their reproductive organs!
I don't feel safe anymore! It's like Good is losing to Evil: crime pays, dishonesty is rewarded while honesty is punished, and good, honest, law-abiding people are being treated like "The Enemy" in society! Up is down, left is right, and the floor is falling out below us!
What kind of world are we living in?!
@mariagny sadly, a corrupt one. I continually scratch my head wondering how this continues in a so called, free world. I’m not optimistic in the short term for anything positive to come about and can only hope the long run will bring some sanity to it all. I am out and now feel I am being forced to tread carefully. I hate it.
@mariagny I think that where you are has as much to do with this anything else. While it's very true that the media seems very anti trans these days, my experience, on a recent trip around the country (I'm in the UK) was rather a positive one overall. In some places I had a very normal time of it & mostly no one was really bothered.
Obviously haters will always hate regardless & advocates will always be positive but I have found most people to be unconcerned as long as it doesn't affect them directly. I voted on the fence as it's difficult to judge what the future holds with a new government in place. The last incumbents were a worry but we have yet to see what the future holds.
@sashabennett I love your glass half full attitude. It’s very refreshing. I voted on the fence too because I’m hopeful the new government sticks to its promises & treats everyone fairly. You’re right, “haters are always going to hate’ but we can’t just go into our shells because of them. If we do that then they’ve won & we can’t let that happen.
Its a long road ahead of us and the trans community.
Unfortunately, I see the road we are headed down. Its hard to believe that in such a short time of enlightening, the world turned their back on us, when they saw just how many of us there really are. It scares them. And in trying to slow down the acceptance of our community, they have opened a box of mischievous acts that are will eventually hurt not just us, but those that should be seeing the writing on the wall.
Hopefully in time, after the I told you so phase, we can once again come together and pave an enlightened and peaceful road to happiness.
I understand, I am also fearful for the future, but trying to be optimistic. With all the anti-trans and anti-LGBTQ laws they are trying to pass and all the increased violence I don't really know how it will go. There has already been a news story about a NB Trans-person who died in Oklahoma after being attacked by 3 or more Cis-Het girls. And at the time of the article the girls weren't suspended or facing any charges/repercussions for it. Hopefully people don't start thinking it's ok to murder transpeople.
Yes, much time will take. Discrimination of LGBTQI+ due to misunderstanding and misplaced hatred is in many US states. Medical professionals are ignored for political gains. Many setbacks have occurred in recent years, including states attacking youth seeking gender-affirming care. LGBTQ Nation is one of many sources that tracks and reports on the news and politics.
I'm just coming out this year and what a hell of year to come out to...but I can't keep wearing this mask and staying in the closet. History hasn't looked fondly on those who oppress and keep marginalized groups down. It's a shame society has moved backwards in some areas but that just means we have to keep moving forward and change the current again. We have to be the change in order for things to start changing. The road will be long and hard but if we give up then we won't get to where we need to be.
One significant problem is that MANY continue to believe that gay and trans people “become”. However, that was NEVER the case. We come into this world as we are.
If people would spend some time reading about the lives of gay and trans people, they would find that we knew that we were different from our peers at single digit ages in MANY cases. We didn’t know what it meant and had no words to describe it, but we knew that we were different.
Also, if our sexual orientation and our gender identity was something that had happened, then conversion therapy would work as we would be reversing something that had changed. But, conversion therapy does not work. You can’t reverse something that wasn’t a change to begin with.
In addition, many seem to be invested in the Zero Sum Game. It plays out like this:
In order for me to have Rights, it means that (somehow) your Rights are diminished.
The perception that Rights are finite, but that is not what happens. You can’t measure Rights. They exist or they do not exist. You have Rights or you do not have Rights. They don’t exist quantitatively. You can’t walk up to the Deli Counter and ask for a Pound of Rights, but people seem to act as if you could.
Yes, all of this worries me deeply; not only for my wife and me, but also for my daughter, her husband, their daughters and my son.
Last presidential election cycle I seemed to be out of sorts all the time with a very generalized background anxiety. This was VERY unusual for me and I couldn’t seem to connect it with anything. It wasn’t until the election was over, and Biden had won, that I understood what had happened. My undefined anxiety was due to worry about the outcome of the election.
Over the years, I have encouraged trans people to be politically active in the towns and cities where they live. I am VERY tired of hearing “I’m not an activist. I just want to live my life.”. However, if we, as a community, don’t become involved, there may be no life to live.
@flatlander48 couldn't agree with you more DeeAnn. We are insulated to a large extent from the madness that is occurring in the US and Great Britain. Yet the antitrans activists insist on comming over here (Australia) and attempting to stir up the CIS population with their lies and hatred. Not to mention I can't turn on the TV without some so called expert or influencer citing yet again another story that shows how mentally unsound we all are.
Unfortunately the average CIS person has never met a transgender individual and ignorance is a powerful weapon against us. If you do nothing more than tell people your story and educate them with the truth, you are doing our community a service.
@mistressb There are 2 parts to this. Within our community, many L’s, G’s and B’s don’t have a good understanding of what being transgender is. I’ve had conversations with gay men and when the subject of being transgender comes up, they think of drag. That’s how things are connected in their minds(and that really burns my ass!). Some lesbians think trans women will cancel them (that also burns my ass!). I can’t see how that is going to happen as the lesbian population is several times the population of trans women. So, many of the people who should be our allies and have some degree of understanding are clueless. My counter to this is visibility within the community. I am a board member of The LGBTQ Community Center in Palm Springs, Vice-Chair of our LGBT Democratic Club and Community Liaison Officer for my LGBT car club. I am the only trans person serving in an official capacity for these organizations.
The second part relates to the general populace. I definitely agree that it is important for people to see trans folks in the world functioning as anyone else would. So, my strategy is to take advantage of my situation and be visible. I am a docent at the Palm Springs Air Museum. I’m there Friday mornings and all day on Sundays. Over that time I probably come in contact with at least 300 visitors. I engage them, present information that typically they didn’t know and see to it that they have a good experience when they visit my hangar. I go at it from the standpoint that if I’m having fun, they will also. I’m sure that at least some will realize that they are talking to a trans woman, but so far it hasn’t come up. We have just over 300 volunteers. I haven’t met most of them, but I don’t have any indications that there are any other trans people.
So, after a career spanning 43 years and now retired, I have have time to do some things that interest me and serve a larger purpose. I consider myself fortunate as most trans people don’t have that luxury. It is similar to that old saying bout keeping women “barefoot and pregnant”. If trans people are living a hand-to-mouth existence, they have nothing left over to participate in any civic or political endeavors. Basically they have been removed from the equation.
As an icebreaker at our last board meeting for The LGBTQ Community Center, our Chair put the question to us:
Why do we want to be on the board?
When it came to my turn, I said that I understand the significance of my being here. I am 1 of 1. (What this implies, and that I didn’t say, is that I am the only trans person and the only Black person on the board). I said that I think saying is true:
”If you are not at the table, chances are that you are on the menu”.
It is something that we all should consider.
@flatlander48 I'm there with DeeAnn. I live in the UK but it is a similar political climate. We had our big PRIDE march in my City end of May, which I marched in.
In some ways I was mistaken for being a CIS lesbian as I do pass...so even with my none trans specific hat on...I am just 'Queer' (I have embraced the term and don't mind it at all) Dividing LGBTQ+ into categories is a mistake in my view. We are different to the majority but not alien. It is a shame we have to carry a label but it is necessary to get our difficulties and needs known.
How do we change it? It's about what you do in life, that is how the public will judge. Only the truly bigoted will criticise someone who is an asset to the community. Someone who engages, promotes and supports others and is downright pleasant lol.
i suspect some 90% of the population never think about or notice Trans people. We don't have targets on our backs...well no more than anyone else. It is natural we will see the hate or violence against us disproportionally. In reality it isn't as bad as 30yrs ago...so we are moving forward still.
I am just me to everyone I meet. I say 'Hi, I'm Alex' the trans part isn't important.
In my experience those who struggle with me being 'trans' are people struggling with their own beliefs not mine.
Societies have moved forward a lot in their inclusive agenda, and that is ongoing. We aren't the only ones being persecuted for being different, that can be easy to forget.
The people to make the situation better, are us, as those before us did.
@alexl I agree...tho I don't happen to like the term "queer," which conveys to me the idea of something (or someone) who is abnormal, strange, oddball, or even BIZARRE. We are NOT abnormal, but people just striving to fully realize who--exactly--we are. Blessing to all here today!!! 
Amen Deeann. We must be involved in procuring and maintaining our rights
@mustangtoni I think too many people have an incorrect perception about activism. It isn’t limited to leading or participating in protests. There’s working for/with organizations and candidates that support us by phone banking, texting, preparing post cards and financial support. There are MANY things that are pretty invisible.
I get it I think it even boils down to how we represent ourselves as transgender persons in our daily encounters in our communities we are all ambassadors in our own way
@mustangtoni I have always been a clothes person. This was true for Don before and DeeAnn now. When I was a kid, my father would tell me “Look like you own something.” and at the age of 75, that is still significance for me. I do admit that one vice I have is short skirts, skorts and dresses with many 6”-7” above the knee. But, I don’t do ripped jeans, hoodies, low cut this or back out that. I have a number of silk or silk blend items that I love to wear and an extensive collection of jewelry, shoes and hats. I don’t want anyone to think that is some way I am “less than” based on how I look. Actually, in many cases I am dressed better than many cis-gender women that I encounter. I have no intention of bragging, but it is true.
Several years ago, I went to a UPS Store opening that was owned by some friends of mine. They had a business partner that I had not met previously. She gushed over my outfit and how nice I looked. She did this maybe 3 times. It dawned on me that what she was really saying was how nice I looked compared to those “other” trans women. The giveaway was that she had to keep complementing me. That is well beyond what most people would do. The fact that she kept talking strongly suggested that something else was going on.
