Hiding Breast Growth at Work

What have you done to hide growing breasts?

Transitioning at my conservative workplace will probably be an issue. I want to fly under the radar as long as possible. I'm looking for advice on how to conceal my growing breasts. See my topic for more info.

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  • Sports bra under a loose fitting shirt
  • Camisole under a loose fitting shirt
  • Tank top under a loose fitting shirt
  • An unbuttoned sweater or light coat over a loose fitting shirt
  • Silicone breast petals to cover my nipples early on
  • Something else (post in comments)
  • Creator
    Topic
  • #118986
    Emily Alt
    Participant

    Hi Everyone,

    I haven’t posted in ages. 2021 has been a roller coaster ride filled with uncertainty. One significant positive is starting HRT about a month ago. I’m doing estradiol valerate subq injections. No blockers. Monotherapy. Planning for the inevitable growth of my breasts is the subject of this poll.

    My breasts haven’t started growing yet, but I can feel changes. Notably my nipples are more sensitive and become erect easily. Tenderness is also becoming apparent. I think in a few months my breasts will start to become more noticeable. That’s likely to be an issue at my work.

    My workplace is fairly conservative – especially with the team I manage. Lots of toxic masculinity. I’m pretty sure I’ll lose their respect once I come out, or if they figure it out on their own. Once that happens my job will become very difficult. So I want to fly under the radar as long as possible. I’d love to do that until I retire in about 2 years, but it’s not realistic. If things get truly ugly, I can retire early. That’s a distinct possibility. I have no intention of changing jobs this close to retirement.

    So I need to find a way to safely hide growing boobs at work. It’s a typical California office environment – loose interpretation of dress casual. I also use the company gym regularly – where I think it’ll be harder to hide them.

    I want to find out from the community what you’ve done to hide breast growth. I’ve been told binders are bad for growing breasts, so I won’t be doing that. I have a few ideas what might work. If I missed something please list it in the comments. I’d also love to hear about products you would recommend. Thanks in advance!

    3 users thanked author for this post.
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  • Author
    Replies
    • #120750
      DeeAnn Hopings
      AMBASSADOR

      Many of the responses here seem to be driven by personal perspective. While we all have our own thoughts about Emily’s situation, I suggest focusing on her original question. That is the reason for this thread…

    • #120712
      DeeAnn Hopings
      AMBASSADOR

      I agree that there are laws and company policies that work to prevent untoward things from happening in the workplace. In theory this is correct, however the reality is that people can be VERY disruptive in very subtle ways. It is very difficult to prevent or penalize that. I think things need to reach a certain point before you can say that a given event becomes actionable. If something can be plausibly explained such that it isn’t necessarily discriminatory, you can’t make a case. Internal policies don’t often require that level of proof, but it’s a fine line when you have to take the cohesiveness and morale of an organization into consideration. This increases in significance if there is a risk of losing a part of the workforce.

      2 users thanked author for this post.
    • #120636

      The poll surprised me Emily…hide them? I’ll never hide them. Of all the physical changes my puppies (yes I know lol) are my pride and joy, they ache and often itch most of the time…and I love it. Still growing and A+ after 6months. I’m fully out and always a woman so I guess that is a luxury I can afford. The No1 gender signal I guess and one that builds my self confidence the most…if a bit of a leap into the unknown in the early days. At what point will you admit it? Perhaps better to come clean now than let the behind your back gossip build. Perhaps I am just a bold woman, be yourself and grow as you will…you can’t hide it for long anyway.
      Waiting for those hips to get going now.

      • #120689
        Emily Alt
        UNITY

        Hi Alex,

        If it were as simple as just doing my job and ignoring the gossip, I’d come out tomorrow. The reality is coming out will make my job nearly impossible. I lead a team of IT pros. Most of the staff on my team are very conservative. Trump supporters. Conspiracy talk. Anti-mask/anti-vax. Hate liberals. Being trans is worse than gay. You get the picture. When they find out I’m trans, they’ll refuse to work with me. Sure, I could go to management and HR to demand fair treatment. They’re smart enough to not challenge that (law is on my side). If they compel my staff to work with me, I expect they’ll quit. Then I have a bigger problem. That’s why I want to fly under the radar as long as possible. When I do come out, it’ll be with the assumption that I take an early retirement.

        One thing I haven’t mentioned is my life out of work. I have no intention of hiding who I am. Boobs will be on display. I’m already out to some friends and family.

        Emily

        2 users thanked author for this post.
        • #120711

          Emily can we not discriminate against people on the basis of suspected discrimination to ourselves because we are afraid to come out at work, or anywhere for that matter. if you hide or not is your concern and no one else’s. I have in the last two years invited six company’s to legal settings addressing their discrimination against me. five i won what i was seeking without going to court. one i still have over a year to sue them because they did not give me my simple request to not be denied the right of access that is guaranteed by the Americans with Disabilities Act. incidentally all i was seeking was the respect i was due. every one of the denial of my rights was the result of political influence. So i am an expert on discrimination because a certain political group, and their propagandizing news agencies say that if you don’t wear a mask it is because you are an anti-masker. i don’t wear a mask, and legally do not, because i have COPD and Complex PTSD. I cant use a shield because of the pressure it apply to my head due to Acute Migraines. so you know i am a three times recognized permanently disabled person. not once have i been discriminated against because i came out. i am also an anti-vaccinator but not because i wont allow myself to be part of the sheep theory. i don’t because the last vaccine i had had an adrenaline chaser to revive my heart beat. i personally don’t like needles, especially the long ones they shove through your chest to get into our heart. as for me all you have to do is give me some penicillin, as little as a single dose of Aspirin, or any Sulfide and i will die. guaranteed. i was fortunate enough as a child to learn all about it after i was brought back to life because Doctors can’t seem to read a file before they react. as for the conservative issue. lets face it politics is nothing more than a religion. one against another. an election is only a popularity contest, this is where well placed propaganda and fear mongering comes into play. i am a conservative by default when i am forced into one religion or another, but honestly i am an independent who applies my voice for the best of two evils. so thank you for discriminating against me in your post and since a certain sitting politician has said it is ok to discriminate against people as long as you are a member of their party you will not get into trouble. just be glad of one other thing. your post, if your company was to get a hold of it, would be seen as a discriminating statement, in writing. if they are fair about it you will be called to the carpet and not those you claim are in the wrong. come out at work or don’t. but stop blaming others for you own fears.

          • #120748
            Emily Alt
            UNITY

            Hello Megan,

            I’m sorry to hear about the difficulties you’ve encountered. It saddens me that society still creates needless barriers to our happiness and well being.

            However, I will not apologize for what I wrote. I am not writing about hypotheticals or suspicions. I see this behavior every day. It is my reality. It sucks. I am dealing with the situation as best I can.

            It’s apparent we do not agree on much politically. I do not wish to start a debate. Perhaps we can agree to disagree?

            Best,
            Emily

          • #120749

            you missed my point Emily. every time i was discriminated against was from people spouting the same thing you are so as far as i am concerned your post was discriminatory against me even if you did not directly call me by name. the manor you presented it was offensive. your answer to me is offensive and I deem it an attack hidden behind the false face of a sheep.

        • #120710
          Miss Cloé
          MANAGING AMBASSADOR

          Sadly, that is a very real possibility.  I was a manager of an IT team and things managed to go sideways despite best efforts.  People who decide to leave can be quite vindictive on their way out the door and your own superior is just looking to see that team cohesion is intact.

           

          1 user thanked author for this post.
          • #120746
            Emily Alt
            UNITY

            I agree. It’s maddening that some people are so entrenched in their beliefs that they would ruin someone’s career before they would try to learn about someone that’s different. I’m one of the lucky ones. I can bail with little consequence.

        • #120690

          Hi Emily
          It is so cruel, I understand I hope. The UK is far more tolerant, well where I am anyway. It’s great you get to share your boobs with your friends, I hope they give you nice compliments too, that is so reassuring. Wrong thread to say more lol. A camisole and loose jumper works, and you don’t swing about when you lean over a desk, that’s embarrassing.

          1 user thanked author for this post.
          • #120747
            Emily Alt
            UNITY

            Southern California in general is pretty tolerant. I’ve never had a problem anywhere I’ve gone. Some communities are outright welcoming toward trans people. But it’s not hard to find people and places that ostracize us – even in California. Unfortunately, the place I work is one of them.

            Appreciate the wardrobe recommendation. I was thinking a camisole was a good option. I hadn’t thought about swinging boobs and the resulting faux pas. Not a display I want to make, but something I’ll secretly love.

    • #119085

      i got my first bra three months after i started HRT hormones. it was an A cup about half way to a B. the people i lived with had no idea i had started treatment to something they had no knowledge of as well. i was able to hide my breast growth by just the oversized shirts i was wearing ever since i was in my 20’s. the only reason anyone learned i was in treatment was because i decided to come out.

      3 users thanked author for this post.
    • #118999
      Jasmine
      MANAGING AMBASSADOR

      I want to say don’t worry what everyone else thinks. And who cares if you dress in suit and have breasts. I mean who cares about my breast growth. Its not like its anyone’s business.

      I cant completely mean that.  You have made it this far in life and made the decision to transition, so you need to accept and live with the consequences of your decision. Though it will be a bit hard as your body and mind change. And I do mean  mind change, that may be a bigger issue the breast growth. Maybe its just me. But the emotions come on easily than you think. just something to think about.

      Other than than, I wear a bra, fitted tank top, loose shirt and safety vest with the breast pockets filled with something. It creates a illusion that works for now. If my research is right, I should natural max growth at about a medium B cup.

      Hope that helps, a little, I am sure some of our other girls may have some creative ideas.

      **HUGS**

      3 users thanked author for this post.
      • #119207
        Emily Alt
        UNITY

        I can live with the consequences of my decision.  I’m just trying to delay them as long as possible at my work.

        2 users thanked author for this post.
    • #118994

      You should never have to hide your sexuality or gender at work. If your colleagues are behaving in a way that makes you feel belittled, humiliated or unsafe, you need to speak to your trade union representative. They will look at measures to put in place that will ensure you can do your job as a trans woman just as effectively as you were doing previously. You have nothing to be ashamed of.

      1 user thanked author for this post.
      • #119142
        Emily Alt
        UNITY

        I’m not concerned about being mistreated. Everyone on my team is smart enough to avoid gross infractions like that. They’ll simply refuse to work with me. HR could compel them otherwise. If that happens they’ll find jobs elsewhere. Every one of them is highly skilled and would have no problem finding work. Replacing them would be a difficult task.

        Flying under the radar as long as possible is the safest choice for me. I don’t feel like I’m giving up anything by doing so. I still get to be myself outside of work. Eventually the physical changes will become obvious. When that time comes I’ll reevaluate.

        1 user thanked author for this post.
        • #119165

          Emily,

          I completely understand  your concerns as I have experienced them myself.  I work with the public every day as well as a team of about 15 people. I had mostly worn formfitted clothes through my life and I began slowly changing to more conventional and looser fitting shirts with tight tshirts underneath.  I have been on HRT now for been 9 months and have experienced a noticeable increase in my breast size that would certainly be noticeable to anyone.  I wish you all the best in your work situation and in your transition.

          Brenda

          3 users thanked author for this post.
        • #119144
          DeeAnn Hopings
          AMBASSADOR

          In the space between Here and There, it is a matter of what we can live with. It is a different equation for everyone. Eventually transitioning is enough of an upheaval without other potential side dramas. That is very telling and it is what can make each situation very different. There is no one road to town. There are many and we have to figure out which one fits best…

          2 users thanked author for this post.
          • #119206
            Emily Alt
            UNITY

            Agree with everything you said DeeAnn. Its taken decades for me to get where I am. I’m as sure as I can be transition is the right path. As much as I dislike the probable outcome of transitioning at work, I’m lucky to have a good exit strategy. If things go beyond what I can tolerate, I can simply walk away.

          • #119208
            DeeAnn Hopings
            AMBASSADOR

            Fortunately our situations are/were very different from what many trans people face. You can pick up and leave if need be. When I came out, I was 3 1/2 months from retiring so there was no downside for me.

            My public coming out was in front of ~130 people when I volunteered to be the Mistress of Ceremonies for an open to the public entertainment event put on by my LGBT employee affinity group. The audience included some co-workers. Beforehand I had The Conversation with my daughter and son (both grown and living in other states), 7-8 close friends and my then department manager. What I did suited me, but I would not recommend this to anyone else. I guess my thinking was that coming out is a non-trivial event and should be treated as such. BUT, and it is a Major But, many would be very uncomfortable with what I did. Therefore, we all have to figure out the path that we can live with and actually carry out. We owe that to ourselves…

            2 users thanked author for this post.
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