What have you done to hide growing breasts?
Transitioning at my conservative workplace will probably be an issue. I want to fly under the radar as long as possible. I'm looking for advice on how to conceal my growing breasts. See my topic for more info.
- Sports bra under a loose fitting shirt
- Camisole under a loose fitting shirt
- Tank top under a loose fitting shirt
- An unbuttoned sweater or light coat over a loose fitting shirt
- Silicone breast petals to cover my nipples early on
- Something else (post in comments)
- This topic has 45 replies, 19 voices, and was last updated 1 year ago by
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- Topic
Hi Everyone,
I haven’t posted in ages. 2021 has been a roller coaster ride filled with uncertainty. One significant positive is starting HRT about a month ago. I’m doing estradiol valerate subq injections. No blockers. Monotherapy. Planning for the inevitable growth of my breasts is the subject of this poll.
My breasts haven’t started growing yet, but I can feel changes. Notably my nipples are more sensitive and become erect easily. Tenderness is also becoming apparent. I think in a few months my breasts will start to become more noticeable. That’s likely to be an issue at my work.
My workplace is fairly conservative – especially with the team I manage. Lots of toxic masculinity. I’m pretty sure I’ll lose their respect once I come out, or if they figure it out on their own. Once that happens my job will become very difficult. So I want to fly under the radar as long as possible. I’d love to do that until I retire in about 2 years, but it’s not realistic. If things get truly ugly, I can retire early. That’s a distinct possibility. I have no intention of changing jobs this close to retirement.
So I need to find a way to safely hide growing boobs at work. It’s a typical California office environment – loose interpretation of dress casual. I also use the company gym regularly – where I think it’ll be harder to hide them.
I want to find out from the community what you’ve done to hide breast growth. I’ve been told binders are bad for growing breasts, so I won’t be doing that. I have a few ideas what might work. If I missed something please list it in the comments. I’d also love to hear about products you would recommend. Thanks in advance!
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Hi Emily
I have noticeable breasts (I am not on HRT). They bounce even when I am just walking casually. It has gone to the point that my wife bought me small and medium size UNIGLO AirSim tank tops for girls. They make me flatter and my breasts much less bouncy. Hope that may work for you.
Alice
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On amazon:
Esteem Apparel Original Men’s Chest Compression Shirt to Hide Gynecomastia MoobsAlong with a slight oversize button-down shirt.
I would probably consider this to be in the “binder” family of tools.
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Hi Emily,
I know this is a response to an older thread but maybe my thoughts may help you or someone else. When I started to blossom, I really did not want to stir the waters at work because just like you, I knew that some people would not say anything to my face but would quietly ice me out. So, only my immediate (and trusted) work partner knew and she was quite ok with it. As I started to get bigger I controlled the flopping with a very tight t shirt first (or like a tight runners top) and then covered that with another larger loose fitting regular t shirt and then my dress shirt over that. Yup it was hot and bulky but I did get it all controlled. Also whenever eating comments came up at work I always mentioned how I was gaining weight and getting sloppy (which was sort of true). After that someone even commented that my face was starting to look puffy and maybe I should lay off the salt. The first tight t shirt was usually beige or light brown so it blended in with my body. Also, there were times when I knew that I would have close contact with others and maybe even a back slap or hug a relative outside of work. Then I wore my “stealth bra” that I made by taking the cups of a very smooth thin bra and cutting off the old straps and band and resewing a new band and straps that I made out of strips of swimsuit fabric. Those strips would lay absolutely flat and would not show through clothing like if I was bending over or someone put their hand on my back. I also changed the front by adding a hook between the cups so it was front opening. If it had an underwire, I pulled it out, so really it just was a thin breast pad. I wore it under the tight t shirt and it never showed through. I sometimes still wear it when I’m meeting lots of relatives and know that there will be lots of hugging and I don’t want to get into a conversation about my undergarments. All of these approaches have helped me to avoid problems in my daily interactions. On a personal level, I avoided pokies in the colder air conditioned areas and the extra layers or padding also helped with chafing. I always wore long sleeves and when asked why I explained that I was becoming more easily burned by the sun and needed to cover myself up more to prevent damage or cancer in my advanced age (which is also the truth). Needless to say I did not participate in group pickup ball games nor did I go swimming in the company pool. I was already taking care of two very aged parents and excused myself regularly from most of the hangout at work after-parties. I also gradually adopted a look that included a sport coat, sweater or lab coat almost every day. So, perhaps you’ve already solved most of these problems and been able to effectively control your work environment while transitioning. That would be great and I’d be so happy for you, but if not maybe these little helps will be useful.
Safe Journey my friend,
Marg1 user thanked author for this post.
These, and other similar products, prevent nipples from showing…
https://www.herroom.com/magic-bodyfashion-35nc-solution-silicone-nipple-covers.shtml
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I just let it hang out, small but definite breasts with large nipples. I’m a giant at 6’8″ 250lbs who will never pass as female, so nobody has said anything.
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Oversized hoodie worked in the winter. Now that summer is coming in SoCal I am going to do nothing. Not my problem. If others have a problem oh well. It was funny. I almost always wear flip flops. Today I went into the grocery store and in my way out this older gentleman looked at me then looked again with a puzzled look on his face. I am sure what ever he was thinking would have made me laugh. With my white toenails, ankle bracelet and boobs. Don’t forget about the boobs. As I present male. Lol
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I work in a very toxic environment and hide my 42 D chest with a binder . I had begun my transition years ago but had to stop for personal reasons. I am now actively seeking to finish what I began so long ago.
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Unfortunately there are a number of people who have had to suspend their transition for a time for any number of reasons. I think the important thing is to give it conscious thought in order to arrive at a good decision…
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Sisters,
During the winter, it’s easy to wear something loose with a tee shirt. But I like to wear my high corset under my shirt.
Now, I live female 24/7. So no problems.
Your Loving Sister
Gee
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I came fully out at work long before l started any procedures or even had contact with my health care provider. Never had a thought about hiding but started wearing padded pushup bras and silicon helpers as well as hip padding and a waist chincher to accentuate a female body.
Marianne
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Small B cup, and it’s never been an issue at all, lots of men have boobs, Mine don’t really stand out in my loose t-shirts and carhart flame retardent company issue long sleeve shirt
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I fully understand your need at the moment to conceal your breast growth. But this difficult time will pass, there is light at the end of the tunnel. The day will come that you will be very proud of your breasts. Hang in there!
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Many of the responses here seem to be driven by personal perspective. While we all have our own thoughts about Emily’s situation, I suggest focusing on her original question. That is the reason for this thread…
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I agree that there are laws and company policies that work to prevent untoward things from happening in the workplace. In theory this is correct, however the reality is that people can be VERY disruptive in very subtle ways. It is very difficult to prevent or penalize that. I think things need to reach a certain point before you can say that a given event becomes actionable. If something can be plausibly explained such that it isn’t necessarily discriminatory, you can’t make a case. Internal policies don’t often require that level of proof, but it’s a fine line when you have to take the cohesiveness and morale of an organization into consideration. This increases in significance if there is a risk of losing a part of the workforce.
The poll surprised me Emily…hide them? I’ll never hide them. Of all the physical changes my puppies (yes I know lol) are my pride and joy, they ache and often itch most of the time…and I love it. Still growing and A+ after 6months. I’m fully out and always a woman so I guess that is a luxury I can afford. The No1 gender signal I guess and one that builds my self confidence the most…if a bit of a leap into the unknown in the early days. At what point will you admit it? Perhaps better to come clean now than let the behind your back gossip build. Perhaps I am just a bold woman, be yourself and grow as you will…you can’t hide it for long anyway.
Waiting for those hips to get going now.6 users thanked author for this post.
My original response and subsequent thread was deleted by the ambassadors about 2 weeks ago. The thread had become contentious for reasons I won’t go into. Suffice to say the ambassadors did the right thing by taking it down.
I’m responding again to Alex’s comment for the sake of providing a clearer perspective on my work situation. Hopefully future readers will find it helpful.
As most of us know, transitioning on the job isn’t easy. Even under the best of circumstances, it’s reasonable to assume there will be challenges with management and/or coworkers. In my situation, I’m certain the challenges will be very significant.
I lead a team of IT professionals at a public water utility. I have a good professional relationship with all of them. However, I have strong reasons to believe they will not accept a transgender boss. If management directs them to work with me, it’s likely some or most of them will quit. Each of them is highly qualified and sought after by other employers. Quitting would be no more than a minor inconvenience.
My department (IT) supports every aspect of company operations. Losing a chunk of my workforce and incidents of gross insubordination would have major implications. I don’t have the luxury of ignoring workers that won’t accept me as their boss. I have to balance my needs with the needs of the company and the needs of the public.
Outside of work I’ll be out and proud. In fact, I already am. But at work I’ll fly under the radar as long as possible. When hiding becomes difficult, I’ll come out with my retirement ready to go. If things get ugly, I’ll simply walk away. I’m in a position where that’s entirely viable.
Emily
I’d like to start by saying this is a growing concern of mine. No pun intended. I’ve been on Estradiol and Spiro for several months now and even with baggy t shirt and sweat shirt they are becoming noticable. My primary concern is that they have been out pacing the rest of me and as such I don’t want to be a guy with breasts. As much as I enjoy having them. So to touch on the original question I have been looking into binders.
The same that trans men wear to aid with their dysphoria regarding their breasts. There are also tapes and other bindings such as wide ace bandages.
If you look on most of the fb transgender support groups there are plenty of ftm trans people that could probably guide you in that.
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I initially had the same idea. But I’ve been told numerous times to not wear a binder while my breasts are growing. Apparently, highly constricting garments such as a binder can damage breast tissue. This can lead to stunted or deformed growth. So I’m taking that advice to heart and looking for other alternatives. If I have to deal with the fallout from coming out sooner than expected, so be it. I’m not willing to compromise the health of my boobs for my career. I’ll bail if things get ugly.
I want to say don’t worry what everyone else thinks. And who cares if you dress in suit and have breasts. I mean who cares about my breast growth. Its not like its anyone’s business.
I cant completely mean that. You have made it this far in life and made the decision to transition, so you need to accept and live with the consequences of your decision. Though it will be a bit hard as your body and mind change. And I do mean mind change, that may be a bigger issue the breast growth. Maybe its just me. But the emotions come on easily than you think. just something to think about.
Other than than, I wear a bra, fitted tank top, loose shirt and safety vest with the breast pockets filled with something. It creates a illusion that works for now. If my research is right, I should natural max growth at about a medium B cup.
Hope that helps, a little, I am sure some of our other girls may have some creative ideas.
**HUGS**
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I can live with the consequences of my decision. I’m just trying to delay them as long as possible at my work.
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You should never have to hide your sexuality or gender at work. If your colleagues are behaving in a way that makes you feel belittled, humiliated or unsafe, you need to speak to your trade union representative. They will look at measures to put in place that will ensure you can do your job as a trans woman just as effectively as you were doing previously. You have nothing to be ashamed of.
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I’m not concerned about being mistreated. Everyone on my team is smart enough to avoid gross infractions like that. They’ll simply refuse to work with me. HR could compel them otherwise. If that happens they’ll find jobs elsewhere. Every one of them is highly skilled and would have no problem finding work. Replacing them would be a difficult task.
Flying under the radar as long as possible is the safest choice for me. I don’t feel like I’m giving up anything by doing so. I still get to be myself outside of work. Eventually the physical changes will become obvious. When that time comes I’ll reevaluate.
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Which is really a sad aspect on society Emily…obviously you are good at what you do and just because you change your outer appearance to match the true you, it doesn’t suddenly make you unable to do your job. You’re still the same competent person who just happens to have breast now!
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Our society is littered with examples of the prejudice DeeAnn speaks of. It goes way beyond being trans. Certain racial, ethic, and socio-economic groups are also considered a threat by some people. Changing ones appearance, or simply having the “wrong” appearance, can have devastating consequences in our society.
Things are better today for sure. But we still have a long way to go. I think it will take a few more generations before we’re there.
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The thing is this: a lot of effort and energy goes into maintaining hate and prejudice. It doesn’t happen by itself. People have to keep feeding it and supporting it.
My brother and I were estranged (such a nice sounding word!) for close to 20 years. Separately, but in parallel, we both realized that all of the energy that went into holding a grudge could be put to MUCH better use. It is infinitely better to think well of someone compared to thinking ill of them. When we think well of someone, it opens the doors to all sorts of other possibilities that would not have happened otherwise.
Probably does your blood pressure some good too…
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Yes, but that is the nature of prejudice, isn’t it? There is nothing rational or logical about it…
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Emily,
I completely understand your concerns as I have experienced them myself. I work with the public every day as well as a team of about 15 people. I had mostly worn formfitted clothes through my life and I began slowly changing to more conventional and looser fitting shirts with tight tshirts underneath. I have been on HRT now for been 9 months and have experienced a noticeable increase in my breast size that would certainly be noticeable to anyone. I wish you all the best in your work situation and in your transition.
Brenda
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In the space between Here and There, it is a matter of what we can live with. It is a different equation for everyone. Eventually transitioning is enough of an upheaval without other potential side dramas. That is very telling and it is what can make each situation very different. There is no one road to town. There are many and we have to figure out which one fits best…
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Agree with everything you said DeeAnn. Its taken decades for me to get where I am. I’m as sure as I can be transition is the right path. As much as I dislike the probable outcome of transitioning at work, I’m lucky to have a good exit strategy. If things go beyond what I can tolerate, I can simply walk away.
Fortunately our situations are/were very different from what many trans people face. You can pick up and leave if need be. When I came out, I was 3 1/2 months from retiring so there was no downside for me.
My public coming out was in front of ~130 people when I volunteered to be the Mistress of Ceremonies for an open to the public entertainment event put on by my LGBT employee affinity group. The audience included some co-workers. Beforehand I had The Conversation with my daughter and son (both grown and living in other states), 7-8 close friends and my then department manager. What I did suited me, but I would not recommend this to anyone else. I guess my thinking was that coming out is a non-trivial event and should be treated as such. BUT, and it is a Major But, many would be very uncomfortable with what I did. Therefore, we all have to figure out the path that we can live with and actually carry out. We owe that to ourselves…
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Are you saying your manager doesn’t want to be asked about your bust or your nipples? I don’t see how you could hide the boobs you have. A minimizer bra will lessen their projection but they’re still going to be obvious. If your nipples are the issue, the covers DeeAnn suggested would be a good option.
A couple of bits of information…
Minimizer bras act to reduce breast projection by forcing some of the breast tissue sideways.
As an alternative to padded bras, and a solution that would allow you to wear any bra, would be nipple covers. There are many varieties, one of which is:
https://www.herroom.com/magic-bodyfashion-35nc-solution-silicone-nipple-covers.shtml
Agree with Barri here. Your boobs look great! How long have you been on HRT and what are you taking?
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This doesn’t surprise me. I’ve read about several girls shopping experiences at VS. The common complaints are many of the staff don’t know how to accurately measure, and if you’re bigger than the largest bras they have in stock, they’ll tell you you need a smaller size to make the sale. Personally, I would shop elsewhere for this and several other reasons.
Tasedr, Your’s are far better developed than my own, lucky girl, I wear a 2xl shirt..just because that’s my size, nobody has ever said a thing to me aside from one other maint employee that poked me in my nipple a while ago and asked…what’s that? I told him it was my ample bosom and unless he wanted a big super weird hug, he should leave them alone.
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Southern California in general is pretty tolerant. I’ve never had a problem anywhere I’ve gone. Some communities are outright welcoming toward trans people. But it’s not hard to find people and places that ostracize us – even in California. Unfortunately, the place I work is one of them.
Appreciate the wardrobe recommendation. I was thinking a camisole was a good option. I hadn’t thought about swinging boobs and the resulting faux pas. Not a display I want to make, but something I’ll secretly love.
Sadly, that is a very real possibility. I was a manager of an IT team and things managed to go sideways despite best efforts. People who decide to leave can be quite vindictive on their way out the door and your own superior is just looking to see that team cohesion is intact.
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Hi Emily
It is so cruel, I understand I hope. The UK is far more tolerant, well where I am anyway. It’s great you get to share your boobs with your friends, I hope they give you nice compliments too, that is so reassuring. Wrong thread to say more lol. A camisole and loose jumper works, and you don’t swing about when you lean over a desk, that’s embarrassing.3 users thanked author for this post.
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